Oblivious no more
by deLattre
Summary: What if Monty Uno had been less oblivious during Operation G.R.O.W.U.P?
1. Caught

Nigel roused himself from the ground painfully. No sooner had he done so that Kuki caught sight of him and shrieked. "Aaah, I think I found him!"

The rest of the team joined her, only to reel back in dismay: Nigel's body was at least three times it's normal size.

"Poor Numbuh One." murmured Abby sadly.

"Ugh." Nigel groaned. "I, I'm an adult! The Delightful Children used an age changing ray on me." The others bowed their heads, their worst fear confirmed.

"So, what do we do now?" asked Hoagie, fiddling with his fingers.

"Yeah!" exclaimed Wally. "We need a plan ter get even with these treehouse-wrecking delightful dorks from down the lane!"

"That's-that's your problem now." he let out.

"Say what?!" shouted Abby.

"I can't be a Kids Next Door Operative anymore." Nigel explained mournfully. I'm not a kid anymore."

"But Numbuh One, you can't quit!" pleaded Kuki. "We need you to beat the Delightful Children!"

Nigel felt himself grow annoyed. Why was Kuki constantly clueless? Did she do it on purpose? "Don't you get it, Numbuh Three? I'm an adult! I can't be your leader anymore."

"So that's it?!" said Abby in disgust. "You're just going to walk away? What will your parents say when they see you like this?!"

"I don't know, Numbuh Five." he answered, unable to look her in the eyes. I guess we'll find out soon."

With that, Nigel limped into his house, leaving his stunned teammates to their own devices. No matter how much he wracked his brain, he could find no alibi. In all likeliness, if he told his parents the truth about his accident, he would eventually have to spill the beans about the Kids Next Door. True, when the Delightful Children had made him bald, he had found a believable excuse: a scientific experiment gone very wrong. But being transformed into an adult? That was something else entirely. How was he supposed to hide from his parents the fact that he had suddenly aged twenty years? It was hopeless. Unless he managed to steal the age cigar...But that meant sneaking into the Delightful Children's mansion at night, and if they woke up, or if he ran into Father, it was game over. He might as well forget it. Oh yes, this was definitely not good.

* * *

><p>At 7 PM, as usual, Monty left work for home. He hummed contentedly during the twenty-minute ride. It was a glorious rainy day, the kind that reminded him of home. Home...one day, he would have to take Nigel to visit England. Sometimes, he had the impression that Nigel had forgotten his English origins. It was wonderful that he had made American friends, but this really shouldn't come at the expense of his national identity. Well, no matter, he could plan a father and son trip to England for their next vacation. All in good time.<p>

Monty drove his car into the garage and got out. Humming, he went into the kitchen to fix himself a drink. "Oh Nigel? Are you home, old bean?"

"I'm here, dad" came a morose voice from the living room. Intrigued, Monty followed the voice to it's source and gasped.

"Nigel? Is that..._you_?"

"Yes, it's me," said his son resignedly. "Let's sit down. I can explain."

They sat down on the sofa. There, Monty shook his head convulsively. "What's going on? You look like you've aged twenty years!"

* * *

><p>After making one last, fruitless attempt to find an alibi, Nigel opened his mouth. "The Wigglesteins, the children from Down the Lane...they did something to me today."<p>

"The Wigglesteins, you say?"

"Yes, they live in a big mansion down on Avenue lane. You must have heard of them."

Monty looked at Nigel in confusion. "No, the name doesn't ring a bell. So these Wigglesteins turned you into an adult?"

"Yes. They attacked us at our Treehouse for absolutely no reason, and they used an age cigar to turn me...into an adult."

A pause.

"Nigel, I don't know why these Wigglesteins would have attacked you. But we're going to make sure that these children are punished. I'm calling the police."

Nigel looked at Monty in amazement. It was the closest his father had ever come to sounding agressive. "Um, dad, are you sure about this?"

"I'm very sure." he replied, and indeed the determination in his voice was unmistakeable. "No one attacks my son and gets away with it."

As Monty picked up the phone, Nigel stopped him. "Oh and by the way, dad, if you're wondering what that big pile of wreckage is outside, it's my treehouse."

**I apologize for any grammar mistakes. For some reason the website won't let me upload certain words.**


	2. Beyond the horizon

Abby lay spread-eagled on her bed, eyes on the ceiling. When the Delightful Children had made Nigel bald, she had pledged never turn her back on him again. Despite working hard to keep that promise , she had failed today. More, she had failed-by running away from the fight. None of her teammates suspected anything. To them, she had done everything in her power to stop the Delightful Children, until the backfiring cannons had knocked her unconscious. Abby, an intensely honest person, knew better. She had remained conscious after the lasers backfired and could have kept fighting if she had chosen to. But at the thought of attacking the Delightful Children's terrifying machine, her courage had failed her. So she had watched from the shadows as the deranged brats had used their age-changing cigar on Nigel.

A crackling sound caught her attention. "Numbuh Five? This is Numbuh One. Do you read me?"

She rushed over to her walkie-talkie. "I read you, Numba One. How are ya feeling?"

"I'm okay, but we've got serious problems. I had to tell my dad what happened to me, and now he called the police. They're going to arrest the Delightful Children."

"They want to arrest them? Oh geez, this is bad. All right, Numbuh Five'll meet you at your house right away." Even as Abby spoke, she left her room and raced down the stairs.

"No. Stay at home, Numbuh Five. Tell the rest of the team what's happening."

She stopped at the door, unhappy to miss an opportunity of redeeming herself. "Isn't there something else I can do?"

"Not for now. I'll contact you with more instructions once the Delightful Children have been arrested."

"Fine. But Numbuh One, be careful."

"I will."

* * *

><p>The police responded slowly to Monty's call, as if they weren't used to doing their job (which they probably weren't, Nigel thought). It took them half an hour to arrive at the Delightful Mansion.<p>

The ranking officer, a certain Lieutenant Stewart, was sympathetic, though. "You did the right thing by calling us, Nigel." he said. "This isn't the first time that we get complaints about Benedict Wigglestein and his children."

Nigel tensed up. Any misdoing by the Delightful Children which had warranted adult intervention must have been very bad. "Are you saying he's been arrested before?"

"Yep, four times. But Evil Adult Industries has always bailed him out. Not this time, though. At least I hope not."

Before Nigel could say anything more, Stewart held up a megaphone in the direction of the mansion. "Attention, Benedict Wigglestein, you and your children are under arrest! Please come out with your hands up!"

The Delightful Children did as they were told ("no fair!"). They had no choice-they were compelled to obey adults. Father, on the other hand, proved less amenable. The adults and Nigel waited in tense silence for his silhouette to appear on the front porch, but minutes passed and nothing happened.

Just as the police was about to storm the mansion, the door creaked open, and the Kids Next Door's most formidable adversary walked out. "All right, officers, you've got me. I surrender!" he said meekly.

He was covered from head to toe in a black suit. Only his yellow eyes had an expression-they were scowling. Watching the policemen approach Father, Nigel was prepared for the worst. He expected the scoundrel would unleash his pyrokinetic powers. But nothing of the sort happened. Father simply allowed himself to be led into a police car, which drove away. Anti-climax-ism at it's finest.

In any case, the manor became a flurry of activity. Policemen scrambled to set up a yellow line around the yard, sent a team to search the house, and bombarded Nigel and Monty with questions.

Once they gained some breathing room, Nigel looked at his father anxiously. "Dad,are you all right?!"

Monty was massaging his head with his hand. "It's nothing. I'm fine, Nigel." he muttered.

"What's going to happen to Father?"

Monty removed his hand, revealing a dazed face. Well, "I think I'll go talk to the police about that. I'd like to press charges against him."

"Okay, but don't blame him for the other stuff he's done to us. We don't want to, to make him to do something desperate."

Now it was Monty's turn to tense up. "Other stuff? Now wait a second, Nigel-what else has he done to you?"

"Nothing. I'm just saying that I don't to make him desperate. Please?"

Monty's mustache bristled with uneasiness. "We can discuss that in a few minutes. First, let's try to find the age cigar that the Wigglesteins used. We need to get you back to your normal age."

Nigel took a step towards the mansion , then stopped. "It's no use searching the house, dad. It's too big; we'll never find the cigar. But I bet the Delightful Children know where it is."

* * *

><p>Thirty minutes later, back at home, Nigel re-conferred with Abby. He was Numbuh One again. The police had confiscated the Delightful Children's cigar and lent it to him.<p>

"Numbuh Five? It's Numbuh One. Are you there?"

"Numba Five here. How did the arrest go?"

"It went fine." began Nigel. "Father and the Delightful Children surrendered. But there was something weird."

"What?"

"Father didn't put up a fight. And he was laughing when he got arrested."

"So what?"

"So, why would he be laughing?"

Abby shrugged. She knew that Nigel had a tendency to over-complicate stuff. "Numba Five thinks he was probably crazy. Simple as that."

"I guess you're right."

"What are the adults gonna do to Father?" asked Abby.

"I don't know, Numbuh Five. But if he breaks out of jail, we'll be ready for him."

"Numba Five hopes you're right." said Abby gravely. "So what did your dad say?"

Again, Nigel suppressed a lump in his throat. "He wants me to tell him about the Kids Next Door."

The information hit Abby like a truck. She had known their predicament would probably get worse, but it was painful to accept. "No", she whispered. "Numba One, you can't-

"I'm afraid I don't see any other choice." countered Nigel laconically. "He wants to know why the Delightful Children attacked us. He wants to know what I get up to in the Treehouse."

"But Numba One, if you tell him the truth, and Global Command finds out...she didn't finish her sentence. They both knew the penalty for telling an adult about the KND: instant removal from duty.

"I know, Numbuh Five." Nigel didn't tell her that in addition, he knew what was about to happen.

_Numbuh One looked curiously at the giant computer monitor. The Moonbase's science department was empty-there was only him, Numbuh 274, and Numbuh 74.239's brother._

_To his side, the Supreme Leader stirred. "Tell him, Numbuh 74.1"_

_Numbuh 74.1 swallowed a lemon drop in his mouth. He often sucked on candy when he was nervous. "Yes, sir." He began typing rapidly on a keyboard. "Have you ever wondered what would happen if someone revealed our existence to an adult, Numbuh One?"_

_"They would never believe us."_

_"Suppose they did."_

_"Then the illusion would be broken. They would see what we see."_

_"Exactly. And then __the adult would pass on the information to everyone he knows. He would post it online. In twenty one hours, at most, the whole world would know our secret." Numbuh 74.1 did some more typing. A pulsating, purple dot appeared in Cleveland. The map zoomed out to reveal the whole planet, with the terrestrial parts covered in thousands of more purple dots._

_Nigel stared at the map, appalled yet fascinated. Clearly the dots represented everyone who had a computer and who had access to the Internet. The possibility that the secret would spread to the entire world had never entered his mind. He had always thought the reason operatives weren't allowed to tell adults about their double life was to prevent parents from getting involved._

_"What makes you so sure that this would happen?"_

_The orange-haired operative pivoted his body and clutched his lab jacket. "We ran some simulations a few weeks ago. In every scenario the adult blabs. He tells his story to his friends, to the press, to the police, everyone." He raised his hands helplessly. "__It's the downside of the internet. From now on, if there's a leak and it gets on to a computer, then we'll be in hot water."_

_"But who else knows about this?" Nigel asked Chad. " Shouldn't the entire organization be informed?"_

_But the older boy shook his head. "No. We can't risk someone blabbing and telling our enemies about the mechanism. This has to stay a secret."_

_"But why would you tell me, then?"_

_Chad's face was calm but stern. Sterner than usual, in fact. "Because you're one of the few people I can trust with keeping a secret, Numbuh One."_

"Isn't there anything I can do to help?" wondered Abby.

"Absolutely. You can tell Global Command that Father and the Delightful Children are in adult custody. I would, but Numbuh 274 isn't answering."

"Sorry, Numbuh One. I'd do it, but Numbuh Five's radio's got sabotaged by Cree yesterday."

"Terrific." grumbled Nigel. "So who else has a radio?"

* * *

><p>In his room, Hoagie was assembling an electronic model of <em>The Spirit of St. Louis<em>. It was slow going: the right wing was too long and the electrical circuits were short-circuiting. But he would have a more time to work on the plane from now on.

He had been amazed at how easily the Really Really Incredibly Destructive Machine had blocked the Treehouse's artillery fire. The station's ion guns were designed to penetrate every type of solid armor on earth. The technology officer knew-he had tested the guns on sheets of hard steel, iron, and tungsten carbide, the toughest metals in existence. Granted, tungsten carbide plating could deflect long-range hits from an ion gun, but the shots at the Treehouse had been fired from less thirty feet away. The Delightful Children must have had a supplier of weapons from outer space; that explained why Hoagie had never seen the strange metal prior to today. He wished he had seen it before, though. If he had, he'd have put more time into building Wally's battle-suit and less into perfecting his F.L.A.P.P.U.H. Then they would be celebrating another butt-kicking of the Delightful Children, instead of wondering how to keep Sector V going.

Suddenly, an incoming radio transmission startled him.

"Numbuh Two, this is Numbuh One. Do you read me?"

He spoke into his transceiver timidly. "Nigel? Um, are you all right?"

"I'm fine, Numbuh Two, thank you. Listen, I haven't got long. I need your help...

Hoagie listened carefully as Nigel told him what that had happened at the Delightful Mansion and the police station.

...and so, the Moonbase has to be informed, fast. Once my dad knows the truth, he'll tell Numbuh Three, Numbuh Four and Numbuh Five's parents, they'll tell the rest of the town, and so on. If so our secret is exposed, we should expect all sorts of problems. The adults might complain about the collateral damage we cause, or forbid from us working for the KND, or increase our homework load. Anyway, they're going to react, and whatever their reaction is, it will mean bad news for us. Do you understand?"

Despite the seriousness of the situation, relief and excitement were coursing through Hoagie. Nigel was back-the team would survive! "I read you loud and clear, Numbuh One. I'll contact Global Command straight away." An old, slightly irrelevant question then came to Hoagie's mind. "By the way, what did Father look like?"

"The same way he looks on his computer profile. He's covered in black from head to foot and has yellow eyes."

As soon as Nigel signed off, Hoagie obtained the frequency for Global Command.

"Sector V to Global Command. Do you read me?"

Silence.

"Sector V to Global Command. Repeat, do you read me?"

Still nothing.

"That's strange." mused Hoagie. "I could have sworn I had the right frequency. Let's try another sector."

* * *

><p>After he signed off, Nigel briskly made his way to the living room, where his father sat waiting. "So", began the adult once Nigel had taken a seat. "Why did the Wigglesteins-<p>

"Delightful Children."

"Delightful Children, attack you?

Nigel took a deep breath. Time to tell the truth. "To get rid of me. I'm a member of a global organization that fights adults who want to enslave kids. The Delightful Children work for the other side."

"But they're _kids_." reasoned Monty.

"I know that, but we think they've been brainwashed by Father." Now that Nigel thought about it, they had never bothered to find out how Father had brainwashed the Delightful Children. But it didn't matter. That knowledge wouldn't do them any good.

"Father? You mean the man we just met?

"Yes, him."

Monty sat there bewilderedly before bringing on the next question. "So this organization...is made up of kids?"

"Yes. It's called the Kids Next Door."

"I see. So is that you do when you say you're spending time with your friends?"

"Yes." said Nigel laconically. "It's not an easy job, but someone has to do it."

Monty scratched the back of his head. "But what kind of adults would want to enslave you?"

The answer to that question was blindingly obvious. It reminded Nigel that most adults on earth were either villainous or dumb. "Adults who are evil, power-hungry, and hate children, that's who."

"What kind of equipment do you use?"

"The kind of equipment spies use. Except we make ours from household objects. We call it 2x4 technology." He didn't give any unnecessary details. He wanted to save as much possible from the debacle.

"2x4 technology… And how long have you been part of the Kids Next Door?"

"About four years." Nigel said, briefly recalling his graduation. He had come a long way since then. "Since I was seven."

"Four years." repeated Monty, clearly stunned. "But why didn't you-

He was interrupted by a familiar voice on Nigel's walkie-talkie.

"Numbuh One? It's Numbuh Two. I've got some bad news."

"Can it wait? I'm in the middle of a conversation with my dad."

"No, it can't. I'm just outside your house right now."

The British boy rolled his eyes in frustration. "All right then, come on over."

Nigel stowed away his walkie-talkie, but coudn't help but feel curious. What did Hoagie have that was so important it couldn't wait?

"Why did you keep the Kids Next Door hidden from us for so long, Nigel?" Monty asked. "Decommissioned you?! But I thought they only did that once you turned thirteen?"

"You're not allowed to tell adult civilians about the KND", explained Nigel with customary stoicism. "Those are the rules. If you violate them, you get expelled."

Nigel hoped that Monty would be satisfied with this information, but he kept going. He wanted to know what kind of weapons KND villains used, how operatives were recruited, and who was in charge of the organization.

"And what happens if you want to retire?" inquired Monty. "Are you allowed to?"

Nigel bit his lips. He was in a predicament: if he told his father about decomissioning, they would be here all night.

Out of the corner of his eye, Nigel saw Hoagie walk into the room. "Can we finish our talk later, dad? One of my friends is here."

Monty briefly acknowledged Hoagie and looked at his hands. "Let's finish it now. I think it would be best if you didn't participate in any more missions. For now, at least."

Nigel remained cool. He had expected this decision, even if it was still upsetting. "But why?"

"Because I don't want you risking your childhood anymore, or worse. I want to know how dangerous these missions before we decide anything."

"But missions aren't dangerous." Nigel protested.

"Can you at least promise me that you'll avoid anymore dangerous missions?" Monty asked timidly.

"Okay, fine. I promise." lied Nigel. Whatever it took to make his father happy.

Monty breathed a sigh of relief. "Wonderful. I'll leave you with your friend, then. I need to make a phone call." And he walked away, leaving the two children alone.

"Well", Nigel began, "what happened?"

Hoagie flopped down on the couch and took in a deep breath. Nigel remarked he was unusually pale.

"Global Command is completely gone."

Nigel cocked his head in confusion. "Gone? What do you mean gone?"

"Someone activated the sprinkler system in the Moonbase. And the water, it-it wasn't normal water. It as de-aging water. "

Nigel scoffed. "Impossible. There's no such thing as de-aging water!"

"A lot of operatives saw it happen. They were talking to Moonbase communication officers on video screen, and they saw it happen."

"Saw _what_ happen? What exactly happened to Global Command?" asked Nigel quickly, not understanding. He felt his heart thump against his chest.

Hoagie stared at the ground, which definitely didn't bode well.

"Hoagie, did the Moonbase operatives de-age?" Nigel demanded. "Are they all right?"

...

"Answer me! I need to know. There are hundreds of operatives on the Moonbase at this time of the day."

When Hoagie replied, his voice was barely audible. "The water made them de-age so much, they disappeared." He rubbed his eyes with his fingers and began to cry.

Nigel slumped against the couch. The cause of the attack was terribly obvious. It was retaliation on Father's part, plain and simple. He felt tears roll down his cheeks. _What have I done?_


	3. Aftermath

In the first hour following the attack, there was utter chaos and panic. The Supreme Leader and the communication officers on duty had been on the Moonbase when the water fell, and no one knew who to turn to. All over the world, operatives evacuated their treehouses, burned their equipment, and told their parents all they knew about the KND. Fortunately Numbuh 274's second-in-command had survived the attack. Once she had powered through her confusion and grief, Rachel immediately took action. She ordered every operative available to Moonbase Hangar and split them up into fifty search parties. Armed with makeshift boats and impermeable footgear, the operatives scoured the flooded station for survivors. They searched every closet, every munitions room, every cafeteria, every office, and every ventilation duct. Their efforts were largely in vain, though. After five hours, it became clear that only two kids had survived: Numbuh 35 and Numbuh 36. They had had the presence of mind to duck under nearby tables when the sprinkler system turned on. The other forty-three members of Global Command who had been on the Moonbase now belonged to history. As for the sprinkler system, it was filled up with cement. The new Supreme Leader then brought the rescuers together and swore that whoever was behind the attack would be brought to justice, no matter the cost.

* * *

><p>The schoolbus' doors closed behind Abby. Bleary-eyed, she joined Wally and Hoagie at the back of the bus.<p>

"So, how much sleep did you guys get last night?" she asked, taking a seat.

"About three hours, I think." said Hoagie listlessly. Oddly, he had a chess biscuit in his hand, but he was just staring at it rather than eating it.

"Same here." said Wally in the same tone.

"What did yer parents tell ya guys?" asked Wally, resting his head on his hands.

"Abby can still go on missions, but she has to take Cree with her every time." answered Abby, rolling her eyes. "We only have your best interests at heart. You can't be fighting bad guys without our permission. "

"Hey, that's not fair!" exclaimed Wally. "They said that if ah got caught fighting adults ah'd be grounded fer a week. Cruddy grown-ups!"

"So, wait," Hoagie remarked, suddenly curious. "If Cree's babysitting you from now on, does this mean you didn't tell your parents that she's a teen ninja?"

"No, Abby didn't tell them! And she don't want to talk about it." the African-American girl said roughly.

"Right." Hoagie scratched the back of his head, a little taken back. "Well my mom said I'm free to decide what to do." he said, swallowing his biscuit. "But she said that if I'm smart, I'll keep out of the really dangerous missions from now on."

Abby, Wally, and Hoagie hoped that maybe, just maybe, no one at Gallagher would care about what had happened last night, but they were disappointed. Within hours, the news had spread to the four corners of the school, and where ever Sector V went a relentless barrage of questions greeted them.

"What happened last night?!"

"What are the Kids Next Door? Do you guys really fight adults?!"

"Do you really have a giant space station?"

"Is it true that you found magic water?!"

Matters were not helped when Numbuh 36 delivered a message from the Moonabase confirming what had been said last night: every operative serving on the station last night was 'unaccounted for'.

In the early afternoon, Sauerbraten called a school assembly in the auditorium. Sector V sat down next to Rachel and waited.

Nigel, who was closest to the Supreme Leader, leaned towards her. "What's our situation, Rachel?" he said in a hushed voice.

"The simulations were right. The whole world knows our secret by this point" the blond girl replied. "And stop feeling sorry for yourself." she added at Nigel's remorseful expression. "I would have done the same thing if I was in your position."

"And what about the parents? How are they handling the news?"

The commander pursed her lips. "That kind of depends on whether they had kids on the Moonbase."

"Settle down, settle down!" came Sauerbraten's microphone-enhanced voice. Once quiet had been achieved, the principal cleared his throat and began speaking.

"Students of Gallagher. It has come to my attention that there is a global organization of kids out there devoted to fighting quote unquote evil adults. They call themselves the Kids Next Door. Last night, on their secret space station, it seems a number of children from this organization were the victim of...an attack. I'm sorry to say that we don't know if any of them survived."

Sauerbraten paused and pursed his lips. He was polite but his voice had a threatening undertone.

"Unfortunately, it has also come to my attention that some of you are members of the Kids Next Door. Now I don't know who gave you the idea, or where you got your equipment, or who exactly you've been fighting. And quite frankly, I'm not sure I want to know. But as your principal, I can't allow this to continue; we have a responsibility to keep you safe. If you are a member of the Kids Next Door, I would like you to do the right thing and stand up. Now don't worry. You won't be punished, just kept under observation. I just need to know you are."

A heavy silence fell over the room. Abby, Hoagie, Wally, and Kuki all looked at Nigel for guidance. "What should we do, Numbuh One?" said his second-in-command.

In response, Nigel turned to his left. "What should we do, Numbuh 362?"

"I'm thinking, I'm thinking!" she said tersely.

"All right then, but be warned." declared the principal after a minute of getting nothing but silence. "I'm giving any KND operatives in the room forty eight hours to come forward. If no one comes forward, I'll have no choice but to cancel recess-for the rest of the year."

A series of "you can't do that!", "no fair!", and "this stinks!" swept the assembly.

"If you're not happy about this, you know who to blame" said Sauerbraten coolly. He began to walk from the podium.

"WAIT!" yelled Rachel, standing up. "I'm the one you're looking for, sir!"

Immediately, Nigel, Wally, Hoagie, Kuki, and Abby stood up too.

The principal halted and breathed a sigh of relief. "Well, that was easier than expected! Thank you very much, to all six of you. Would anyone else like to come forward?"

The principal waited for a confession that didn't come. "Very well, then. That will do for now. You may return to your classes."

Unfortunately the humiliation didn't end there. An hour after the assembly, the six operatives were summoned to Sauerbraten's office. They found him looking just as hostile as he had in the auditorium.

"You don't have to sit down." he said curtly as they made to do so. "I want you to empty your pockets of any spy gadgets you're carrying. Come on, empty your pockets!"

The operatives blanched, except for Nigel and Rachel. He clenched his teeth, fighting the urge to attack Sauerbraten, and she sat there, looking tired and withdrawn.

"Why?" asked Abby.

"They could be dangerous. I can't allow you to keep them."

"But they're not dangerous!" pleaded Hoagie. "They've never hurt anyone."

"I'm not in the mood for this." snapped Sauerbraten. "I'm facing an inquiry from the School Board because of your organization. Hand them over or I'll call your parents."  
>With a heavy heart, the children pulled out every M.U.S.K.E.T., S.P.L.A.N.K.E.R., S.L.U.G.G.U.H., and walkie-talkie they had and dropped them on the floor.<br>Soon the ground between them and Sauerbraten's desk was covered in gadgets.

To Nigel's surprise, Wally refused to comply with the Principal's demand. "That goes for you too, Wallabee." Sauerbraten stated after noticing that Wally wasn't budging.

Wally's hands were buried in his pockets and he was wearing the same surly expression that he always sported on bad days. He looked laughably aggressive. "Ah haven't got any gadgets, sir." he drawled. "Ah traded them this morning for some yipper cards."

"Oh really? That's interesting. And who did you give them to?"

"Uh...Joe Balooka! Yeah, that's who."

"Hmm. I'll be sure to check with him later. Oh, and I almost forgot (he turned his head in Nigel and Rachel's direction). Rachel and Nigel, I want those listening devices that you're using."  
>Nigel was determined to save something from this debacle, so he did some quick thinking. "But they're not spy tools." he explained. "They're hearing aids!"<p>

Sauerbraten's face creased in confusion. "Hearing aids? At your age?"

"Uh, yeah, we do." chimed in Rachel.

"Well all right, then. You can keep these things. But let me make myself clear." The principal leaned forward on his desk. "You are not to use any more KND technology on the premises of the school. And if I catch any of you, so help me, you'll be spending the rest of the semester in permanent detention. Is that clear?"

"Yes _sir_." said Nigel, his voice dripping with resentment. "But I'm on to you. I know that you and the other teachers are secretly working for one of our rogues. You want to take away our weapons and leave us defenseless the next time Grandma Stuffum or the Six Gum Gang attacks the school. But rest assured, we're watching you very carefully, and we won't fall for your schemes."

Sauerbraten rolled his eyes. He was familiar with Nigel's fears of an 'evil teacher conspiracy', not least because he was part of it. "That's where you're wrong, Nigel. We're the ones watching you. And if we catch you causing trouble, we'll be on you like a pitbull on a mailman. Now get back to class."

"I don't think I've ever been so humiliated." Nigel fumed once they were out of earshot. "And what are we supposed to do the next time a villain attacks the school?"

"It's not as bad you think, boss." remarked Abby. "These attacks cause so much confusion, no one'll notice if we use 2x4 technology. We'll be fine."

* * *

><p>Meanwhile, at the marketing firm where he worked, Monty was writing a letter to a prospective client when the reception phoned him. "Monty , there's a teenage girl here who wants to speak to you. She says it's extremely important."<p>

Monty scratched his head. He had the distinct feeling something fishy was about to happen. "All right, then. Tell her I'll come down and meet her in a few minutes."

His visitor turned out to be an African American girl, quite similar to his son's friend but older. "Can I help you?" he asked politely.

The girl closed the gap between them. Monty wasn't a good judge of character, but he could tell she looked nervous. " ", she said, "my name is Cree Lincoln. I need to talk to you in private. Right now, if it's not too much trouble."

Monty sighed. "Is this important? I'm very busy right now."

"Yes, it's urgent. It's about Nigel."

Monty felt his heart sink. Please, not another accident. "Has anything happened to him?"

"No, nothing happened to him. But I need to talk about him-in private."

Nigel's father threw up his hands in defeat. "Oh very well. But please, make it quick, won't you?"

As soon as she'd received his assent, Cree marched for the door. "Follow me", she called without looking back. "My ship is in the parking lot."

"Ship?" repeated the adult blankly. He tagged along, growing increasingly curious. It turned out that Cree's ship was red flying saucer, with enough room for two passengers.

Monty stopped outside the ship. His earlier intuition had been correct. Something fishy was definitely going on. It almost felt like he was living one of Nigel's fanciful stories. He pointed at the saucer uncertainly. "You don't expect me to-

"Get in." asked, or rather ordered Cree.

Monty dutifully obliged. "If you insist. Where are we going?"

"You'll see", replied the teenager. She hit the ignition button and they rocketed into the sky.

After several minutes of silent flight, Cree landed on the peak of Chestnut Mountain, a six-thousand foot mountain that overlooked Cleveland. .

"Where are we?", wondered Monty once they'd landed. There was nothing here but bushes and rocks. This was starting to look like a kidnapping. "Why have you taken me here?"

Abby's sister jumped off the ship and stepped back several feet. " , I need you to trust me, please. Can you step out of the ship?"

Although increasingly confused and fearful, Monty did as he was told. He noticed Cree had an old-fashioned wooden camera with a wheel crank handle in her hands.

"This might...hurt a bit." the girl warned. She turned the camera's handle.

Instantly, a roaring beam of blue light enveloped Monty and lifted him upwards. He felt like his body was being torn apart. A huge invisible force was bearing down on his forehead; it felt like a migraine, only a million times worse. A thousand images poured into his mind. The pain was so great he couldn't speak or hear the screams that were surely coming out of his mouth. He wanted out, he wanted to die, he couldn't take anymore of this torture. Make it stop, Monty begged inwardly.

And then the beam disappeared. Monty fell to the ground, landing firmly on his feet. He was himself again. His childhood memories, his lucidity-they were back. _He _was back.

He turned to Cree, who was staring at him with a mixture of curiosity and apprehension. "Thank you, Cree. But why are you doing this?"

She looked at the ground, visibly ashamed. "Let's just say I've done a lot of bad things to the Kids Next Door. This is my way of making it up to them."

"I see" he mused. "Well, while you have the recommissioning device, can you recommission my wife as well? She was a KND operative too."

"Okay, but we have to hurry."

Monty looked at her face, which bore a seemingly recent bruise, and understood. "Of course. You stole the recommissioning device. That's why you have a bruise on the right side of your face and you keep looking around, isn't it?"

"Yeah." she admitted. "And they're probably looking for me right now. We don't have much time."

"Then let's crack on."

Mary Uno been on a business trip the previous night, but she was now back at home. Her flight to Chestnut Mountain took place without incident. At 2:40 P.M., Numbuh 999 was reborn.

"Thank you again, Cree." Monty told Abby's sister, shaking her hand energetically. "Jolly good work. You don't mind if I keep the recommissioning module, do you?"

Cree bit her lips in reluctance. She was probably afraid that he would betray her, Monty suspected. "Okay", she relented, "but _please_, don't tell the Kids Next Door where you got it. Okay?"

"Don't worry, we won't."

After flying the couple back to Monty's place of work, Cree immediately took her leave.

"Why do you think she recommissioned us, Monty?" wondered Mary, watching the saucer zoom away. "It doesn't seem like the world is under attack."

Monty glanced at his wife grimly. "No, I don't think the world is under attack, but something has happened. Maybe the Kids Next Door is facing an outbreak of chicken pox, or the status quos has been broken. We''ll find out soon enough."


	4. Confabulation

The lawn in front of Gallagher seemed perfectly ordinary. Then, abruptly, a camouflaged hinged door opened up on the lawn's surface, causing bystanders to gawk in surprise. Nigel clambered out of the opening, followed by Wally and Hoagie.

"Well, here we are." Nigel declared. "And it only took us five minutes.

"Do ya think the _Galla-Lab_ will block the entrance tomorrow afternoon as well, Numbuh One?" asked Wally.

"I hope not. I don't plan on taking this passage everyday, and I'm not interested in answering questions."

With that, the three kids said goodbye and headed to the schoolbus or their parents.

Nigel found his car, got in, then noticed something that his father was sitting in the driver's seat.

« What is dad doing here?" he demanded.

"This is a special occasion, Numbuh One." said Monty smugly.

Nigel cocked his head. "I'm sorry, dad. Did you just call me Numbuh One?"

"That is what you prefer to be called, isn't it?"

"Yes..., said Nigel, "but only other KND operatives call me that." He frowned, tantalizing possibility forming in his mind. His father was acting like an operative. But he wasn't one. Or was he?

"Don't worry" said his mother. "We'll explain everything when you get home."

They reached home without any more discussion and got out of the car.

« All right, what's all this about ? » Nigel asked.

Mary put squeezed her hands together, beaming. « Nigel, dear. We have a surprise for you. Your father and I used to be KND operatives. I was Numbuh 999 and he was Numbuh Zero. And we've just been recomissioned, today! »

Nigel temporarily froze in shock. Then realization set in, and a torrent of exhiliration washed over him. « Oh my gosh, I don't believe it ! », he ranted. « This is the coolest thing that's ever happened to me ! My parents are KND operatives! I can't wait to tell everyone. And we can go on missions together and battle evil adults and stuff. I can't believe it ! And my dad is Numbuh Zero! »

« Of course I am!» asserted Monty. « Where do you think you got your skills from? »

Nigel calmed down slightly. « But I don't understand. How were you recommissioned ? »

«It's very simple. Your friend's sister me recommissioned me and your mother. She used a recommissioning module, which I have here. It's only the recommissioning device in existence.» Monty held out the wooden object proudly, and Nigel absent-mindedly took it.

« So », began Monty in a commanding tone. « What's the situation, Numbuh One ? I understand something's happened to the Moonbase. »

Nigel snapped to attention. « Not just something." he explained grimly. "One of our enemies activated the sprinkler system in the Moonbase, which was rigged with de-aging water. We lost most of our operatives in the station. The Kids Next Door's secret has been exposed and we're under constant surveillance in school. We can't even use 2x4 technology anymore."

Mary gasped. «Are you saying that all these operatives in the Moonbase died?"

"No, not everyone. There was one survivor. But veryone else in the Moonbase got drenched in de-aging water. If you touch it, it makes you get younger. And if too much of it hits you...Nigel trailed off, the implication obvious.

"Oh dear.» said Monty. " And I was half-hoping Grandfather had been resurrected. This is far worse than I imagined. I suppose the first step is to help out the families of the victims as best we can."

"That reminds me, there's something you ought to know, Nigel." said Mary. "The mother of one of the victims called me today. She wants to speak to you."

"Which mother?"

" ."

"Numbuh 91...Nigel said to himself. "And when does she want to talk to me?"

"As soon as you finished school, actually."

«Don't worry, Nigel. We'll go with you." professed Monty. "Everything will be-

«Hold it right there! Nobody move !» yelled a voice.

The Unos turned in the direction of the voice. Fifteen feet above them, two members of the decommissioning squad were hovering on flying motorcycles.

« Is there a problem, Numbuh 99 ? » inquired Nigel stiffly.

« Yeah, there is », retorted 99. « A teen ninja broke into the KND Museums of really cool artefacts today and stole the recommisioning module. Can you explain why you have it?"

« I can't believe you!» spat Nigel. « We're facing a global crisis and all you care about is the stupid recommissioning module ?! »

« All the more reason to be worried when someone steals the decommissioning module! Now hand it over ! »

Nigel motioned to his dad, who threw the decommissioning up in the air. Numbuh 786 caught it and clasped the box around his chest like it was his first born son. Before leaving, Numbuh 99 looked at Nigel angrily. « You'll be hearing from the Supreme Leader about this, Numbuh One" he warned. "Helping a teen ninja is treason!"

Ignoring them, Nigel turned to his father in shock. "Dad, is that true? Was it a teen ninja who recommissioned you?"

"Yes, I believe so." Monty replied calmly. "She's called Cree Lincoln."

"_Cree_?! That's impossible."

"Why impossible?"

"Because she's evil! She would never help you."

"Ah", said Monty solemnly,"but here's the catch, old chum. She didn't do this to help me. She wanted to make sure she doesn't get in trouble when parents find out what she's a teen ninja."

"I guess that's true." conceded Nigel reluctantly. "But she's still got a lot to answer for!"

"I'm sure she does. But if anyone should punish her, it's Global Command or her parents."

Monty then motioned towards the car. "Anyway, we need to get going."

After they drove off, Mary turned towards her son. "So Nigel, how did you know this girl?"

"Well, my team recruited her six months ago. She came to the Treehouse one day and asked if she could join the KND. I interviewed her-sector leaders have authority to do this-and she seemed motivated and competent. So I sent her to the Arctic Base for training. She became a decommissioning guard pretty quickly, probably because no one wants that job. And she was on the Moonbase last night."

Arriving at their destination, Nigel braced himself and rang the door. The Scotts opened and ushered them into to a dark living room. Nigel noted they looked thoroughly exhausted. Clearly the search and rescue team wasn't the only one to have had a sleepless night.

Once they were seated, the hosts wasted no time with small talk. "Nigel", began, "you are a member of this Kids Next Door organization, right?"

"Yes, I am."

"Then tell me: where is my daughter?"

Nigel hesitated, unsure how to break this gently. "She's…

"I'm sorry, ." said Mary soberly."She didn't survive."

The color went out of both parents. rose unsteadily to her feet.

"Ní féidir liom é seo a dhéanamh, a stór. " she said softly to her husband, whose eyes were half-closed. "Ní féidir liom éisteacht leis an. Is gá dom a bheith ina n-aonar."

He placed a hand over hers and nodded. Téigh amach romhainn, a stór. Feicfidh mé in ann déileáil leis seo."

"What language was that?" Nigel whispered to his father, as hurried out of the room.

"Scottish, probably. Not surprising, they are from Scotland, after all."

Meanwhile, slowly re-opened closed his eyes. "Impossible." he said firmly. "She can't be gone. She just can't be. There must be a mistake!"

"I'm sorry." said Nigel, feeling last night's emotions well up. Herbert, Fanny, Chad...if he only he could have saved them. And there was no bringing them back. They were gone...gone...gone. The word assaulted his mind like a hammer. "She was on our space station when it got attacked. And we've looked everywhere."

"I don't believe it." said , shaking his head convulsively. "I want to see for myself. Take me to the Moonbase."

Nigel sighed, knowing it was no good reasoning with this man. He activated the comlink. "Numbuh 274? It's Numbuh One."

Presently Numbuh 362 responded.

"What is it, Numbuh One?"

"I've got an emergency here. Numbuh 91's father wants to go to the Moonbase."

"I'm not surprised. About thirty-five parents have already made the same request. There's a ship leaving the Moonbase in a few minutes to collect grown-ups all over the U.S. Tell that we can pick him in twenty five minutes. Numbuh 362 out."

Relieved, Nigel shifted his attention back to his interlocutor. "There! It's all arranged, sir. A spaceship will stop by your house in twenty five minutes. It will take you to the Moonbase." He smiled, but didn't return the gesture.

"Thank you." he said. "Now if you don't mind, I'd like to be left alone."

They turned to go, but held them back. "Wait a minute, don't leave yet. There's something I want to know. Do you know brought my daughter into the Kids Next Door?"

"Me and my team did." answered Nigel, not thinking anything bad could come from telling the truth.

The exhaustion on 's face was replaced by cold fury. "You."

"Yes, me and my sector."

"How dare you." the adult breathed. "How could you, to invite her into this...insanely dangerous club. Where's your conscience?!"

"Now wait", Nigel protested, "we never forced her to join! She's the one who came to our Treehouse and asked to join!"

"But you didn't do anything to stop her. You must have known how dangerous it was, but you let her join."

"But I told her it would be dangerous. I wasn't specific, but I did tell her!" fired back Nigel, feeling his patience fade.

Mary raised up a hand gently. "You have to understand something, . The fatality rate in the Kids Next Door is extremely low. You have less chances of dying in the line of duty than in an plane accident. That's why Nigel didn't stop your daughter from joining."

"_Liar_." hissed . "I spoke with Betty Gilligan after our meeting today. She told us the things that Kids Next Door agents go up against on a daily basis. Tanks. Giant robots. Plasma guns. And you think that's not dangerous?"

"Tanks and giant robots are exceptional! They're only used by an extremely small minority of adult criminals."

shook his head from side to side slowly. "You're wrong. That's not what Betty said. Those kinds of weapons are used by more than an extremely small minority of criminals. They are, and I quote, 'relatively common.'"

"Now just a minute!" intervened Monty. "The job may be dangerous, but every KND Sector recruits new operatives. It's not just Nigel's team who did it. It's standard policy."

The red-headed man scoffed. "That's no excuse. If everyone stole, would that make it right?"

"It's not the same thing" said Monty sharply.

"It's _exactly_ the same thing."

Monty fell silent, apparently unsure what to say.

"What do you want from us?" asked Nigel, a little bit roughly.

"I'll tell you what I want. If I don't find my daughter in the Moonbase, we'll take you."

Nigel tried to think of a suitable retort, but the situation was so strange and unexpected that it left him at a loss for words. Numbuh 91's father was speaking out of anger, so he probably wouldn't follow through on their threat. But what if he remained angry for a long time? Could he be appeased?

"You can't be serious, man." spluttered Monty, sounding equally nonplussed.

"I'm very serious, . Now please, get out of my house."

**Happy times! The next chapters should be more exciting, I promise you.**


	5. Parks and mansions

After Monty had returned to work, Mary brought her car to a halt next to a Baskin Robbins store on the outskirts of town.

Nigel threw his mother an inquiring glace. "What are we doing here?"

Mary gestured to the store. "How about we get ourselves some ice cream? We certainly deserve it." _And besides, I need some ice-cream to calm my nerves_, she thought. The reprimand from the Scotts had shaken her. They planted a seed in her mind. It declared that KND operatives exposed themselves to incredible dangers on a routine basis. Oh, some villains were lightweights, like the ones who wanted to make kids brush their teeth or do their homework. But a substantial percentage possessed lethal abilities. In hindsight, that had been the situation when she had been a kid, and it was evident that nothing had changed since then. Mary found it strange that she had never picked up on such a glaring problem, considering her exceptional intellect. But it wasn't really her fault-she had been a victim of her surroundings. In order to notice the issue, a grain of curiosity would have needed to be present in her mind. The Scotts had unintentionally provided that grain today, but where would she have gotten it thirty years ago? The drill sergeants? Global Command? Rubbish. The idea that someone could die had never entered their darkest dreams.

But the seed's voice was drowned out by the rest of Mary's consciousness. The larger part insisted that the Scotts were wrong, that they were exaggerating the lethality of KND villains. The odds of Nigel meeting and fighting one were tremendously small. The idea that she had been blind to the dangers of KND activity in her childhood was nonsense. She had made it up on the spot, with the help of today's fear and sadness. The surest proof of this was that she had only two examples to support the idea. Yes, that was easier to believe. For the moment, there was no reason to shake things up, to upset Nigel by forcing him to abandon his customary practices. Only if her son's luck failed him would she take action.

Nigel raised an eyebrow. The store's exterior was certainly bright and colorful, but if he so much as put a foot inside, alarms would blare to life. "That'd be great, mom. But kids aren't allowed to buy ice cream around here. Or anywhere, actually." In fact, Nigel could never recall buying something from an ice-cream store in Cleveland. The only way to get fresh ice-cream was to steal it.

She waved her hand lightly. "Not to worry. I'll buy it myself. What kind of ice-cream would you like?"

"I think I'll have chocolate."

"Are you quite sure? Not pistachio?"

"No, not today."

With that, she strode into the Baskin Robbins store. In less than a minute she was back with two ice-cream cones in hand. Nigel secretly hoped that the store's owner would see Mary handing him the chocolate cone-he was very much in the mood for a fight-but it didn't happen.

"Can we go to Oakland Park to eat?" asked Nigel. The park was on the other side of the road."

"Of course. That's why I picked this store.'

Before leaving the car, Nigel made sure to take a S.Q.O.O.S.H.E. with him. In Cleveland, one could never be too careful.

Oakland Park was a popular destination for people of all ages, possessing numerous ponds, rolling meadows, climbable trees, and a wooded, swamp-ridden hill larger than the Great Pyramids (though it was visible only to kids). But today the place lay half empty. So they had no trouble finding an empty bench, sited a minute from the entrance and at the edge of a pond.

"How are you feeling, Nigel?" Mary asked, licking her ice-cream. She tried to look away from the other side of the pond, where a man wearing a green costume and a jetpack was hovering threateningly over two kids. After what the Scotts what said, the last thing she wanted was for Nigel to get into a dangerous fight.

"I'm not sure." he replied earnestly. "I'm having trouble getting over last night's attack. I still can't believe it happened. And so much has happened today…our 2x4 technology got confiscated, the world learned about our secret, I got threatened with a trial. It's a little overwhelming, to be honest."

"Try to give yourself time. And keep your problems well separated in your mind. It's like using a clothes drawer. When you're looking for a shirt you open one drawer. And when you're done using it and you need a pair of pants, you close the drawer and move on to a different one."

Nigel, ever vigilant, noticed that the man across the pond was now exchanging some heated words the two children. He recognized the man as , a fanatical eco-terrorist. For one terrible second, it looked like would attack. But the moment passed, and he flew away. the Tearing himself away from the scene, Nigel remarked. "I suppose you're right. Besides, it's not all bad news. I have you and dad now."

"Quite right. Although I wish I could do more to help you. Hmm..."

"By the way how does it feel to be recommissioned?"

She stood up, a goofy smile lightening her face. "Honestly? It feels amazing. My ability to think on my feet, my physical capacities, my creativity? They've increased tenfold! I feel like a torrent that was damned up and has been released." To prove her point, she leapt into the air, reaching what must have been ten feet. While airborne she was able to force herself upside down.

"Wow, that's amazing." Nigel rhapsodized. "I can't wait to see what you can do in a fight!"

To Nigel's surprise, the smile faded from her face. "Actually Nigel, I'm not planning on getting into any fights. I want to set a good example for you, if you follow me."

Nigel stared at her, not understanding. "I _don't_ follow you. What example do you want to set?"

She licked her ice-cream thoughtfully before answering. "I'm staying out of KND combat assignments. And if you're smart, you'll do the same. Or at least stay away from the more dangerous missions. The ones where you could get seriously hurt."

His spirits plummeted. "You're joking, right?"

"Come on, Nigel. Be reasonable. I'm not asking you to quit the KND. I just want you to stay away from the more powerful villains, like Father or ."

Nigel looked her in eyes rather aggressively. "I don't see why I should I listen to you. I've always taken care of myself while you weren't around. So I should cut back my involvement now just because you're-(he hesitated, not wanting to say 'responsible again')-because you're not oblivious any more?"

"Because you and most of your teammates have been lucky so far. But your luck will run out eventually. It's only a matter of time. Think back on your career. How many close calls have you had? And tell the truth." she added sternly.

The honest answer was 'hundreds'. In fact, he'd gone through so many close calls that they were now a routine part of operative life to him. Had he owed his survival to luck all this time? Nigel didn't know; he couldn't remember. Although now that he thought about it, he had been reprimanded quite a few times by Numbuh 74.2 for taking unnecessary risks, like using a prototype anti-broccoli suit in combat, infiltrating the Annual Villain's Convention on his own, or giving chase to one of ' submarines with a critically limited supply of air. The Supreme Leader claimed that Nigel was relying on his luck. At the time, Nigel had dismissed the blame as narrow-mindedness. But perhaps Chad had been right. Maybe he was living too dangerously. Except this was different. His mother wanted him to stay out of the more perilous assignments, not to stop taking gambles. Unless...going on perilous assignments was a gamble.

So what was he to do? Nigel weighed the options. Slowly but surely the scale of moderation dipped in his mind. He wouldn't be giving up that much, and he didn't want to argue with his parents so soon after getting them back, so to speak.

"All right, you win." conceded Nigel. "I'll follow your advice. But can I just have one more "dangerous" mission (he quoted with his fingers)?"

Mary nodded, relief washing over her. "One more mission. But I'll want to go with you."

* * *

><p>Meanwhile, in another part of town, Hoagie was getting started on that day's homework. As he tackled a complicated set of multiplications, a knock sounded on his window. He looked up: Numbuh 35 was hovering outside, using an air jet ski.<p>

Somewhat reluctantly, he opened the window. "Urgent message from Numbuh 362, Numbuh Two." said Numbuh 35 immediately, remaining outside .

"What is it?"

"The leaders want to find out who attacked the Moonbase. They think that if Father's behind this, he must have used some blueprints of the station. And they want you to do some investigating in the Delightful Mansion."

That elicited a groan from Hoagie. "Do I have do to this, Numbuh 35? I hate going inside the house when it's empty. You know what it's like. They put their fear detectors on."

Numbuh 35 shook his head weakly. "Sorry, Numbuh Two. Those are the orders. Search the Delightful Mansion and look for a blueprint. And if you find anything else that link Father to the attack, like a detonator, take it with you. Understood?"

"I guess."

"Good. And if you need back-up, use this." He tossed him a comlink. As Hoagie ran his fingers over the grey instrument, the communications officer floored his jet ski and sped off towards the other side of town.

Hoagie watched him disappear, then reluctantly got to work. First, he called Joe Balooka.

The phone rang. "Hello?"

"Hey Joe, it's Hoagie."

"Yeah, I know. What have you telling Sauerbraten? He called me into his office today and accused me of handing out 2x4 technology to school kids."

Hoagie had forgotten how snappish Joe could be. "Oh...sorry about that." he explained sheepishly. "See, Sauerbraten suspected that we carrying some 2x4 technology. So Numbuh Four pretended that he'd given all his gadgets to you."

At the other end of the line, Hoagie heard a mug slam against glass. "What a moron. I'll teach him to lie at my expense!"

"Hey, go easy on him! Sauerbraten threatened to use broccoli torture on us. Besides, he didn't punish you, did he?"

"Well...no." admitted Joe reluctantly. "Not this time. But I don't want to have this conversation again, capish?"

"Okay, you made your point. Now listen, I need your help. I'm doing some investigating for the Kids Next Door, and-"

"And you want me to help you search the Delightful Mansion for clues?"

"Yeah. How did you know?"

Joe sneered haughtily. "It's obvious. Father and his children are the prime suspects in this affair. I'll help you out, but tomorrow. We've got a lot of homework tonight."

"We can't afford to wait until tomorrow, Joe. By then Father might be back!"

"Oh right." said Joe in a mocking tone. "I forgot how scared you were of Father."

"We're not scared of him!" Hoagie protested, feeling insulted. "We just can't search the mansion when he's there."

"Fine, fine. I'll meet you outside the house in twenty minutes."

"Thanks. And bring a walkie-talkie."

After ten more minutes of homework, Hoagie went to his closet. His primary F.L.A.P.P.U.H. was buried somewhere in the Treehouse debris. Fortunately he'd read enough Batman comic books to always keep a spare suit handy. Donning it, he took to the air.

The Delightful Mansion was a short flight away. Touching down, he noticed there was no yellow tape or grown-ups to be seen. Apparently the police had already vacated the premises. Typical.

"Hey, Hoagie! The technology officer looked up to see Joe walking up the lane, wearing a trench coat and a chocolate fedora. Hoagie grinned. Joe wasn't one of his best friends, but he was someone you could trust. Plus, he was a detective, and he usually laughed at Hoagie's unappreciated puns. Sure, they couldn't really talk about missions or 2x4 technology, but that was actually a good thing. As an outsider, Joe was able to look at situations with detachment and give sound advice. Hoagie was glad to have him at his side.

"So, what's the low-down here? What are we looking for?" the other boy asked, drawing up to him.

"We think the Delightful Children and Father are behind the attack on the Moonbase." explained Hoagie curtly. "We need to look for clues of their involvement."

Joe appeared skeptical. "What makes you think they're guilty?"

"Because, the Moonbase was attacked twenty five minutes after they got arrested. That can't be a coincidence." argued Hoagie.

"If the Moonbase was attacked twenty five minutes after...how did he activate the sprinkler system?"

"He could have used a watch."

"Maybe. But it sounds awfully sloppy." insisted Joe. "I don't know oFather or the Delightful Children, but you told me they were already going to jail. So why would they want to get themselves in even more trouble? I think someone framed him. It's a win-win situation. The bad guy strikes a blow against the Kids Next Door, he becomes a hero in the criminal underworld, and Father takes the blame."

"But… how would they know Father had been arrested so quickly?"

"Maybe he told them."

"Why would he tell them?"

"I don't know. Maybe he needed their help. Maybe he needed someone to control Evil Adult Industries while he went to jail. We can't rule it out."

"Okay." sighed Hoagie. "But you gotta admit it's still a big coincidence. We should have a look in the house, at least."

"All right, fine." said Joe.

"Start with Father's office. It's on the first floor-take a left and go to the end of the hallway." ordered Hoagie. "I'll take the basement. Magnifying glasses in hand, they split up.

Wally, who had briefly been imprisoned in the dungeon, had described it as creepy. Looking over the place from its entrance, Hoagie had to acknowledge he was right. The dungeon was a just a long stone hallway, but every ten feet intricately carved statues of children's heads protruded from the walls. Not only that, but the children wore expressions uncannily similar to those of the Delightful Children. Perhaps they were former prisoners, or the Delightful Children's ancestors.

"This place is creepy." muttered Hoagie.

He touched the bars on the nearest cell-and jumped a foot in the air. For at that moment, an alarm blared to life. Simultaneously, five metal doors slammed shut at equal intervals throughout the corridor. Okay, Numbuh Four definitely hadn't told him about that.

But it would take more than that to stop him. Extracting a L.A.S.E.R. (Light Armament Severs Extremely Rapidly) from his pocket, he disposed of the pesky alarm. Then he carved a big hole in the first door. He went on to methodically inspect every room in the corridor. Most the cells contained shackles connected to the wall, and one of them had a metal chair with restraints for hands and feet.

In one cell, he found ancient and battered Justice League of America comic books. Flipping through the dusty pages, Hoagie noticed that the issues all belonged to former incarcerated operatives. Five books contained a message on the first page written by different operatives, along the lines of _my name is Bruce. I am a KND operative. I must not lose my memories._

Father must have been in business for a long time. They'd stopped releasing these issues twenty-four years ago. "Unless he kept these comic books on his bookshelf", muttered Hoagie, "in the off-chance that he captured some operatives. Huh. But that doesn't sound like Father's style."

Moving on, Hoagie reached a cell that was completely immersed in darkness. The one facing it had a closet built into the wall.

The rest of the hall was also taken up by rooms stocked with various weapons, including glue grenades, chunks of broccoli, gum guns, freeze guns, bolas, delightfulization machines ingeniously disguised as cameras, and blasters which emitted a red beam of energy. Hoagie made a mental note to notify Global Command about this arsenal.

But there were no clues in the dungeon. So he moved on to the adjacent bedroom complex, accessed through a door built into the basemen't staircase. Hoagie picked the nearest bedroom and got to work. He searched every corner of the room-under and in the bed, in the pillows, in the closets, in the drawers of the only desk in the room, and under the carpet. He felt the walls and ceilings for secret passageways. It was routine business. However, there was nothing to be found in the bedroom.

As he was about to move on, his walkie-talkie crackled.

"Hoagie, can you get back up here? I need help!"

"What do you mean?"

"I don't know. I touched an object in the living room and now my hand is stuck to it. I can't move at all! You've gotta help me."

"Oh wait, I know what happened!" claimed Hoagie confidently. "Don't worry, I'm on my way."

Hoagie found Joe near the chimney. As expected, both palms of his hands were placed over a giant black bowling-like ball.

"I can't get free!" said Joe, sounding very much on the verge of panic. "What's going on?"

"The ball's enchanted." explained Hoagie. "If you're scared, your hands will stick to it. All you have to do is calm down."

The other detective complied. Almost at once, he broke free. Then he drew back fifteen feet. "This place is creepy." he said in awed, subdued voice. "I don't know why, but I feel scared of everything around me."

"I should have warned you." Hoagie told him. "Father activated his scare machine. It's a machine that gives you every human phobia in existence."

Joe looked at him, clearly stunned. "Every phobia in the world? These people are crazy."

"I know. And it gets worse. Did you know that time actually passes more slowly in the dungeon?"

Joe raised an eyebrow. "What do you mean?"

"For every ten minutes that passes inside", explained Hoagie, "only one minute passes in the outside real. Back when Wally escaped, he thought he had spent six hours locked up. Turns out only thirty-six minutes had passed."

"But...that's impossible." said Joe, shaking his head in disbelief. "Are you saying that Father actually has the power to control time?"

"Yeah, he does. In his house, at least."

Joe took off his fedora and squeezed it hard. "He has to be stopped! Assuming he's guilty, that is."

"Now you understand why we take Father so seriously." Hoagie told him calmly.

"Yeah, I understand."

"Were you able to find any plans of the Moonbase?"

The other detective shook his head. "No. And we're not gonna be able to search the house by ourselves. I had a look-there are at least ten more rooms on the first floor. And they're really big, too. One of them is the size of a football field!"

Hoagie didn't reply, feeling rather sullen. He had jumped into the fight recklessly, not pausing to remember how enormous the mansion was."

"We need back-up!" continued Joe, punching his hand for emphasis. "Can you get us some?"

"Hold on, let me check." said Hoagie. He activated his comlink. "Numbuh 362, are you there, sir?" But the line was silent. "My commander isn't answering. I'll ask her later. And I'll check if Father had any subordinates that might want to betray him ."

"All right, sounds good." agreed Joe. "Let me know when we should start again."

They high-fived each other and turned their backs on the Delightful Mansion.

* * *

><p>After he got home, Hoagie returned to his math homework. However, he tried to contact Rachel again fifteen minutes later. This time she answered. "Status report, Numbuh Two."<p>

"Me and Joe Balooka searched the basement and part of the first floor of the Delightful Mansion, sir. We didn't find any clues. But we need back-up; we can't do this on my own. And also, I was thinking we should try interrogating Father or the Delightful Children."

Rachel scoffed. "Interrogating them? Numbuh Two, you know they'd rather eat spinach than help us."

"Can we try, at least?" pleaded Hoagie.

Rachel gave a frustrated sigh. "All right, I'll give it a try. But don't expect too much. Numbuh 362 out."

Half an hour later, Hoagie was making himself a chili dog when she returned. "Numbuh 2, are you there?"

"Yes, sir."

"I've got your back-up. They're at the Delightful Mansion right now, if you want to join them."  
>"No thanks. I don't wanna go back inside the house today. Those scare machines gave me a headache."<p>

"Fine. Also, thought I should let you know: we've made contact with Father and the Delightful Children, like you asked."

"And?" She sounded unenthusiastic, but it didn't hurt to hope.

"They said no. Father won't talk unless we let him go, and the Delightful Children won't say anything unless Father allows them to. "

"Oh. So we have to do this the hard way, I guess." surmised Hoagie.

"For the time being yes."

"Right." Hoagie was about to hang up when a question came to the forefront of his mind. "By the way, did you analyze the de-ageing water yet?"

"I'm not sure; I don't think so. I'll let you know as soon as we do. Numbuh 362 out."

**What do you think? Any suggestions?!**


	6. Water and greed

"And then he goes, I'm very serious, . Now please get out of my house."

It was break time between the first and second periods at Gallagher. Nigel had just described to Hoagie and Wally his lively confrontation with the Scotts the previous day.

"It's gotta be a joke, Numbuh One. Yeah, it's just a really bad joke!" reasoned Wally none-too-convincingly.

"I think it's no joke, Numbuh Four." Nigel retorted. "They're really taking me to court."

"So what happens if you lose?" asked Hoagie, bringing out the white elephant in the room.

Nigel's expression grew dark. "Juvenile hall, I expect." He shuddered. There were few concepts more terrifying to KND operatives than juvenile hall. It meant complete loss of liberty and fun. It meant adults yielding despotic power over you, forcing you to do their bidding, and molding you as they desired. It was the antithesis of what the KND stood for.

"But you won't lose, will you?" inquired Wally, cringing.

"I'm not sure, Numbuh Four." said Nigel, turning around. "I'm starting to think that anything's possible."

He cut short, for in pivoting he'd bumped into Leaky Leona.

"Nigel, I haf to tell you something!" she begged, seizing his shirt.

Nigel groaned. "Okay, Leona, I'm listening. What is it?"

She let go of his shirt and swallowed hard. "I know where the magic water if!"

Nigel felt his heart leap in his throat. "The youth water?! Where is it, Leona?" he demanded, gripping her shoulders.

"I can fow you." stated Leona. She looked like she was keeping a terrible secret.

"Great!" said Nigel warily. "Can you show us now?" But to his dismay, and that of Wally and Hoagie's, he noticed that tears were now spilling down Leona's face.

"What's wrong, Leona?"

She muttered something unintelligible.

"Say that again?" Nigel inquired softly.

"Ift juff", the girl blubbered, "I need that water to ftay alive."

"Why? Surely you haven't...A ghastly though struck Nigel. "Leona, have you been drinking that water?"

She stopped crying and made a valiant attempt to compose herself. "Yes, I have." she said, sniffing. "For three hundred years."

"Leaping Lizzies." breathed Nigel. "Three hundred years. That's almost as old as the school. So all this time, you've been drinking water from this source?"

"Yef." Leona confessed. "And I know that you're probably going to desfroy it if I fow it to you. But I thought long and hard about, and I think itf for the beft."

"But if ya get rid of that de-aging water", said Wally slowly, "you'll die."

"Iff haff to be done." answered Leona solemnly. "I've been alive long enough."

The second period bell rang. "You should probably get to class, Numbuh Four." advised Nigel. "Numbuh Two and I will go with Leona to the water source. Er...if that's okay with you." he added hastily to Leona.

"Yef. Yef it if." said the girl with an air of resignation. "Follow me."

"Uh, Numbuh One, are you sure we should be skipping class?"remarked Hoagie anxiously.

Nigel waved a dismissive hand. "Don't worry, Numbuh Two. We're skipping math class. It's , remember? He wouldn't notice if half the class was missing."

Leona led Hoagie and Nigel to the girl's bathroom. Once there, she plodded to one of the sinks and pressed the hot valve. With a rumbling sound, a large rectangular slab of the wall came loose and pivoted upwards. Beyond it lay a stone stairway. "Follow me." she said, moving forward.

Walking down the hallway, which grew steadily larger, they found themselves in a gigantic vaulted hall, easily the largest they had ever seen. It looked like a cathedral: the ceiling rose hundreds of feet into the air and was supported by massive square columns. To their left loomed a series of equally tall stone bookshelves. It was towards those shelves that Leona headed. Walking with a sense of purpose now, she went to the third row of the third bookshelf and placed her hand on the third manuscript.

"I'm leaving you here." she told Nigel and Hoagie once they'd joined her. "I'll open a fecret pafage that will take you to the fountain of youf."

"But how will we get back?" questioned the British boy. Despite Leona's kindness, it sounded like a trap.

"Iff eafy. Theref only one way to get back. You'll fee it behind the fountain of youff. And whatever you do, don't talk loudly or eat any food you fee!"

Leona then took several steps to her right and pulled out the third book.

With another rumbling sound, the ground under Nigel and Hoagie's feet retracted. They fell into a river ten feet below, which continued through a dark tunnel carved in the rocky floor. Conveniently, the river sloped downhill at a forty degree angle and the walls were studded with luminous crystals. Thus they zoomed through the tunnel, past curves and bends, feeling very much like they were in amusement park.

"This is awesome!" laughed Hoagie. "It's like the water-slide from the carnival!"

"Yeah, it is kind of fun!" admitted Nigel. "I just hope it isn't a trap."

Of course, all good things must come to an end. After a few minutes the tunnel spit them out into a vast and deep fountain, positioned at the end of a bridge. They clambered out, dried themselves up a bit, and gasped.

To their left, beyond an impenetrable abyss, was the most fascinating sight they had seen in many years. They were looking at a vast, gleaming, fountain, fed from two holes in the wall. More than thirty feet high, it was decorated with ornate statues and illuminated by a golden aura which appeared to come out of nowhere.

For some time they gazed in awe at the fountain. Eventually Hoagie spoke up. "I think we've found the fountain of youth." he said momentously.

"Only one way to find out." said Sector V's leader with characteristic decisiveness. Activating his rocket boots, he coasted over the chasm to their left and landed in front of the fountain. Hoagie, having no means of flying, took a more round-about land route.

"Let's see if this is the real thing." uttered Nigel. Cautiously, he immersed his right hand into the lower level of the spring. Nothing happened. He plunged his entire arm into the water. This time he got what he bargained for: in a matter of seconds he felt his body shrink. Just as quickly he withdrew his arm and took three steps backwards.

"Numbuh One!" exclaimed Hoagie fearfully. "Oh no! What should we do?!"

"Don't worry, old friend." Nigel assured him. "If this is the water from the Moonbase, I'll return to my normal age momentarily."

For some reason Hoagie then stared at him in amazement. "Numbuh One, you've got hair again! Check it out-feel your head!"

Nigel ran his hand over his scalp and grinned. "I do! The water must have made me eight years old again! This is"-he returned to his normal size-"amazing." he finished dully.

"So what happens now?" said Hoagie, twiddling his fingers.

"It's very simple. We either block the fountain's source, or destroy the entire room."

Hoagie tugged at one of his hat's straps, looking downcast. "Do we really have to destroy it?"

"Of course we do. It's far too dangerous to leave intact." Nigel thought Hoagie should have known this. It was he, after all, who had received Rachel's message this morning: analysis of the de-ageing water had revealed that it infected all liquids came into contact with.

Nigel peered intently into the cavernous space behind the fountain. His eyes and ears registered nothing unusual, which was reassuring: apparently they hadn't been followed. With a little bit of luck, no one else would discover the fountain before it was eliminated.

He turned around again. "Come on Numbuh Two. Let's get back to class."

* * *

><p>The rest of the morning, including the return journey, was fairly uneventful. During lunch, Robin Food attempted to infiltrate the cafeteria, wearing a very poor disguise. However, Nigel and his teammates were able to apprehend the scofflaw, albeit with some difficulty. They were eating desssert when Sauerbraten came on the PA.<p>

"Attention, students!" he announced. "This is Principal Sauerbraten speaking. I have a very important announcement to make."

He cleared his throat. "It has come to my attention that some of you have been trading your ordinary toys and knick-knacks for Kids Next Door technology. This is unacceptable. From now on, anyone who is caught with Kids Next Door technology will have their shares at the Gallagher Lunch Exchange immediately confiscated. That is all. Enjoy your lunch." He signed off.

Sauerbraten had just triggered what would eventually be called the Panic of '06. At once all the students holding shares in the Lunch Exchange broke into feverish conversation. 2 x 4 gadgets were highly sought-after. Though they looked mundane and primitive on the surface, they were capable of accomplishing the most extraordinary tasks, and no great skill was required to yield them. They were already a contraband item of sorts, in fact. Most operatives who went to Gallagher sometimes trade technology when they desperately needed a service. Naturally this practice was forbidden, and was rigorously opposed by Rachel and Nigel. But the two operatives had never been very successful at stamping out the contraband, because they were too few and they couldn't punish Gallagher's ordinary students. Now, however, students who got their hands on KND gadgets could be punished by teachers. The shareholders in the cafeteria concluded that they had a choice to make. They could either give up their Lunch Exchange investments, or their hopes of obtaining technology. It was an easy choice, and within moments the shareholders were walking towards the room next door, where the Lunch Exchange was located. Unfortunately, when they realized they had the same purpose in mind, the walk swiftly turned into a stampede. Pandemonium ensued. Every student was desperate to sell his shares before their classmates did so. The situation might have been salvaged had the Lunch Exchange operators done their job. Instead, in an incredible display of stupidity, they withdrew their own shares and allowed the students to do the same. One operator did keep a cool head. He attempted to check the crowd by firing water balloons into its midst, but this only made the kids angry and more , the Hall Monitors and Sector V managed to fight their way through to the market controls and shut down the Exchange. But by then, the damage was done: predictably, the rash of selling had caused stock prices to fall by 80% percent. Those who hadn't been able to sell in time were left with useless merchandise (mostly Yipper cards). It was an utter fiasco.

At least Sector V could take comfort in being mostly unaffected. The only who had invested in the Lunch Exchange was Wally.

"Ah'm broke!" he lamented at the end of the day, holding a bunch of Yipper cards that had been flagged as worthless. "This stinks!"

"Oh, give it a rest, Numbuh Four!" entreated Hoagie. "You only lost five cards. "Is it really such a big deal?"

"Easy for _you_ ter say!" exclaimed Wally. "You've got like, a buh-million of them!"

"Well, I guess I could give you some cards if it means that much to you. " Hoagie conceded, "But then I'll need your help in building some training robots in the Treehouse."

"Uh, Numbuh Two? We ain't got a treehouse anymore, remember?"

Hoagie's face fell. "Ah rats. I keep forgetting. Well then, I guess you can just-

He broke off. The group had reached the bottom of the stairs outside the school entrance, but the path in front of them was blocked by five boys and girls wearng cowboy outfits.

"You're not going anywhere, Kids Next Door." drawled the Six Gum Gang's leader, Runt. "We heard what happened. Because of you idiots, all the yipper cards we had on the Lunch Exchange are worthless. They're ruined!"

"And why is that any business, Runt?" replied Nigel stiffly.

"Because you made the Lunch Exchange crash. Now either you pay us for the cards we lost, or we're gonna get physical on you."

"We're not paying you anything, shorty." retorted Abby. "We didn't cause the crash."

"Can't we negotiate, Runt?" asked Nigel, doing his best to sound diplomatic. "I'm sure if we put our minds to it we can find a way to make your yipper cards valuable again."

Wilbur laughed coldly. "We don't negotiate, Nigel, except with our fists. Never have, never will."

Runt nodded at Wilbur in agreement. "So what's it gonna be, Numbuh One? We don't have time to waste. We want an answer now."

Abby leaned towards Nigel. "Numbuh One, let's just retreat inside the school. They'll never dare to fight us inside." she whispered.

But Nigel shook his head. "We don't need to retreat. Now that the Delightful Children aren't there, no one's protecting the gang. We've got a chance to fight back."

"Make it easy it on yourselves." warned Runt, clearly sensing his intention. "Without your gadgets, you fellas don't stand a chance."

Ignoring him, Nigel raised his arm. "Kids Next Door, "BATTLE STATIONS!" he yelled. Immediately the operatives charged at the robbers. They carried no weapons-Sauerbraten's warning was fresh in their minds-only their fists. With a series of cries, they plowed into the Gang.

Nigel took on Runt. He expected to easily overpower the short, scrawny, leader. But within a few seconds his hopes came crashing down. As he grabbed Runt's shirt, he received a vicious head butt that sent him crashing to the ground. Dazed, Nigel saw the thug ran forward, no doubt intending to pin him down. Nigel rolled aside just in time and got up, but Runt didn't stop. With lightning speed he seized hold of his arm and twisted it. This move would probably have been the end of the fight, but the aggressor's technique was flawed. Nigel used the respite to punch the other boy in the solar plexus, knocking the wind out of him and freeing himself. The British boy had just enough time to take a breath and wonder how Runt could be so skilled, then the scoundrel was on him again. Nigel raised his arms in a defensive posture. But as the other leader began hitting him, he quickly realized it wasn't enough. Runt's fists moved with bewildering speed and precision. They systematically found the openings in his defense, though Nigel did his best to block them. The blows fell on his stomach, collarbone, face, chest, shoulders, causing him to wince in pain. It felt like getting hit by a two-ton brick. What fighting style he was using? Jujiutsu? Bojuka? Judo? Nigel didn't know, but he hadn't seen this level of skill in a fighter since training with Chad. And the barrage showed no sign of slowing down. He was able to deflect a few hits, but it wasn't enough. So he did the obvious. He caught Runt's left wrist, then the right one. Runt strained furiously to free himself, raising their arms above their heads and pushing forward against his opponent. But Nigel stood his ground and pushed in the opposite direction. He decided to play this game for a few moments. By the time he let go, Runt's strength would probably be depleted, making him vulnerable to a counterattack.

To Nigel's left, Hoagie confronted the second-in-command of the group, Dixie. While his combat skills surpassed those of his opponent, Dixie was faster. Whenever Hoagie attempted to land a blow, the girl deftly moved out of the way. Hoagie couldn't finish off the bully, and didn't dare turn his back on him in case she sucker-punched the technology officer. They circled around each other, waiting for an opening. Impasse, though Hoagie. But he thought wrong. All the sudden Dixie lunged forward and yanked Hoagie's ankles from under, causing the pilot to fall flat on his back. Before he could get up, Dixie pinned his legs down with his knees, pulled out some rope from his coat's interior, and tied Hoagie's ankles together securely. While Hoagie frantically tried to untie himself, Dixie wrenched off his cap and goggles. "I'll tell you what, Hoagie", she sneered in a hurried manner, "I'll just take your hat and goggles. I'd say that evens the debt between us. So long!" And without another word, she dashed to the nearby road, where her vehicle was waiting.

Further to the left, jujitsu and boxing met brute force, and it did not take long to see which was superior. Within a minute Abby and Wally relaxed slightly. They were in control. They could even afford to hold back: compared to fighting the ice-cream men or Stickybeard's crew, this was child's play. Meanwhile, between getting their arms firmly caught behind their backs or upper-cutted to the pavement, the two cowboys were wavering. Their business was harassing helpless children, not battle-hardened secret agents. Time and again they threw themselves at Abby and Wally, thinking that if they could just land a punch the operatives would collapse. After two minutes, though, it was obvious the tactic wasn't working. And so, dazed and humiliated, the bullies did what they had never done before and fled. The victors looked around to see if any of the other combatants needed their help.

At the end of the line, Kuki had bitten off more than she could chew with Lunk. Her blows lacked the strength necessary to defeat her opponent, let alone hold him at bay. There was skill hidden within her, but to access it she had to be fully motivated. Easier said than done, as her teammates had learned the hard way. Goof took full advantage, sending punch after punch at her face. Kuki managed to stay on her feet, but the punishment steadily took its toll. She tried to dodge the punches. It worked for a minute, until the bully simply seized her sweater.

He lifted her off the ground, jeering. "You're the worst KND agent I've ever met. But I guess I shouldn't be surprised, with you being a girl."

He didn't notice the way her features became contorted with rage. He only heard her reply. "Take that back right now!"

"Why don't you make me?!"

Finally, Kuki was ready to prove herself. Before Lunk knew what was happening, she had pried his hand off her and knocked him to the ground with a leg sweep. Then she dropped onto his chest knees first, pinning him down. "_Take it back_." she growled.

Even as the outcome of the brawl turned in Sector V's favor, several screams of "STOP!" rang out, making the remaining eight kids freeze. A group of parents was rushing towards the battlefield. To his astonishment, Nigel was dragged away by his mother. Before he knew it, he was in the car, leaving the school behind him.

"Are you all right, Nigel?" asked his mother, although she sounded more curious than concerned.

"I'm fine." said Nigel soberly. "But I wish you had held back for a few minutes. I'm sure I could have beaten him."

"I'm sure you could have but I didn't want any teachers to see you fighting." she said lightly. "You don't need that kind of trouble."

"I suppose not."

"I must say", remarked Mary, "I'm surprised the Six Gum Gang hasn't been shut down yet. By the police, I mean."

"Well I'm not. In fact, I'm willing to bet they bribed or brainwashed the police. They have the support of Evil Adults Industries, remember?"

"Perhaps, perhaps. But it's worth a try. I'll stop by the police station later on and ask if they can get rid of the Six Gum Gang."

"Thanks, mom, but you don't have to call. We can settle this problem ourselves."

"But you don't have to." insisted Mary. "You're not alone anymore."

They drove on, away from battle and to it.

* * *

><p>Numbuh 36 sat on a bench in Piedmont Park, Atlanta. He checked his watch: five minutes past the agreed time and still no sign of Chester. He wished the man would hurry up. Not because he was late, but because the sky was grey and cloudy, and Numbuh 36 really didn't want it to rain. He didn't like rain-it reminded him too much of the downpour on the Moonbase. He inspected the ominous clouds for a long moment. Thankfully, when he lowered his head, he saw that Chester was shuffling his way forward. The adult was wearing a white laboratory coat, but appeared to be unarmed.<p>

Numbuh 36 made sure his helmet was placed the right way. He couldn't afford any mistakes, not when he was finally getting some recognition for his years of selfless, tedious, bureaucratic work.

Chester flopped down on the bench next to the new Mission File Security Chief. "All right, kid." he said in his characteristically nasal voice. "Let's get this over with."

"You've got it." replied Numbuh 36. He put on his most authoritative voice. "Okay, look me in the eyes. Can you tell me that you weren't involved in the attack on the Moonbase?"

"Of course not." sneered Chester. "Why the heck would I have been involved?"

"Geez, I don't know...maybe because you've attempted to kill operatives before?!" said Numbuh 36 sarcastically.

"Except I only kill for money. What money could I have possibly have made from Monday night's attack?"

Numbuh 36 blinked foolishly, caught unaware. "Wait, you only kill for-

"Money, yeah. Didn't your supreme leader describe my profile before sending you to meet me?"

"She did, but she never gave me that bit of information." confessed Numbuh 36. He pondered Chester's words for a moment. If the guy was telling the truth, then he was innocent. Money wasn't relevant here. And yet...

"Someone could have paid you to help carry out the attack." considered the Mission File Security Chief.

Chester huffed contemptuously. "To help? What for? To build a detonator? I don't build detonators, kid."

It was a fair point, and Numbuh 36 realized it. Thus he rose from the bench. "I have nothing more to ask you for now. But we may have some more questions in the near future. Also, we might to need to search your house eventually."

"I can hardly wait." replied Chester, getting up as well. "I think you know where to find me." He hurried away.

**Comments? Suggestions? By the way, for those of you who are wondering what the Gallagher Lunch Exchange is: it's a child version of the New York Stock Exchange. Instead of stocks and bonds, however, the kids trade and invest food and yipper cards. It appears in one of the tie-in comic books to the show.**


	7. Discoveries and battle

Hoagie was able to untie his ankles without too much trouble. The moment he was free, he ran towards the line of parental cars. Abby shouted something about where he was going, but he ignored her. He darted his eyes around, looking for Johnny's car, but his efforts were in vain. Johnny had already left, of course. Well, there was nothing more to do at school. Feeling his face burning with anger and humiliation, he boarded the schoolbus. He saw that Abby, Wally, and Kuki were now being scolded by two teachers, and found that he couldn't care less. It was as bad enough that he'd lost a one-on-one fight, but to have his goggles and cap stolen? It was like losing a piece of his soul.

Nevertheless, the anger and humiliation eased off by the time Hoagie reached home. Tomorrow he could ask his teachers to knock some sense into Johnny, or exchange his belongings for som technology. At worst, the cap and goggles could be replaced. Besides, he couldn't allow himself to mope: the Moonbase attack needed investigating.

Hoagie got to work straight away. As it happened, operatives from the computer science division had recently managed to break through the encryption shields protecting Evil Adult Industrie's website. Armed with this information, Hoagie made good progress. Within half an hour found out that Father had been president of Evil Adult Industries for twenty five years. Most of his subordinates had come and gone. Only three had stayed on for significant lengths of time . There was George Oswald, Father's vice-chairman, Philip Munster, Director of the Treasury, and Maxima Doom, Director of Public Relations. They had held their jobs for twenty, sixteen, and twelve years, respectively.

Clearly Father trusted them more than anyone else at Evil Adults Industries-their long years of service and senior positions were proof of that. This meant that they must have been the first ones to learn about Father's arrest. Therefore, at least one of them had probably been involved in the attack on the Moonbase. And yet, the henchmen had surprisingly good profiles. Munster regularly donated money to a local orphanage, Oswald had successfully lobbied to increase the number of vacation days in American schools, and Doom had helped fund three amusement parks. In addition, neither of their names appeared in the KND criminal archives. But of course, none of this could conceal the fact that they worked for Evil Adult Industries. Hoagie supposed that the next step, besides than continuing to search the Delightful Mansion, was to interrogate Munster, Doom, and Oswald. But how to contact them?

It was then that Numbuh 362's voice sounded on his comlink.

"Numbuh Two, are you here?"

"Yes, sir."

"Don't go to the Delightful Mansion. Father's just been released from jail."

"He's been released." repeatedly Hoagie dully. "Wow, that was fast.

"I know, but that's how adults works."

"Well, uh, since you're here, I've made some progress on the investigation."

"Fire away, then."

Hoagie didn't need telling twice. He proceeded to describe his findings in lavish detail.

"So let me get this straight, Numbuh Two." said the Supreme Leader when he'd finished. "You think that because these two guys worked for Father for a long time, he trusted them more than anyone else?"

"Yeah, I do. It makes sense, doesn't it?"

"Well as far as we know, Father didn't have any friends. The team I sent to the Delightful Mansion yesterday interrogated the neighbors, and they hardly knew Father. And Evil Adults Industries isn't talking. So yeah, I guess it does make sense. I wish we had more leads, but the ones that you found will have to do for now."

"Right. So what do we do know? Should we set up a meeting with Oswald and Munster?"

"Yes. But not at Evil Adults Industries. You remember what happened to Numbuh 113, don't you?"

Hoagie remembered it well. Numbuh 113 had been the Mission File Security Chief years ago. Global Command had sent him to Evil Adults Industries' headquarters on a mission to discuss the rules for treatment of prisoners. However, during his mission, he went over to the adults. Supposedly he realized that Evil Adults Industries was too powerful to defeat, and he wanted to escape decommissioning. But because Numbuh 113 had been the first child to enter the White Tower and the first operative of his Age to betray the KND, his former teammates understandably suspected foul play.

"What's the worst that could happen?" Hoagie tried to reason.

"I'm not sure, Numbuh Two. I'm not questioning your loyalty to the Kids Next Door, but if you go inside the White Tower you could be walking into a trap. I'll contact Evil Adults Industries myself and try to arrange a meeting outside their base. You will await my orders. Is that clear?"

"Yes, sir." grumbled Hoagie. He missed Numbuh 274. He wasn't nearly as bossy as Numbuh 362.

* * *

><p>Nigel was sprawled against the living room couch, eyes glued to the TV set. Most ordinary children who'd finished their homework would have been watching cartoons, rather than the KND Nightly News. But Nigel was hardly an ordinary child.<p>

_"We're getting reports that about fifty operatives have been forced to resign by their parents, because of the Moonbase attack." a _grim-facedNumbuh 10 was saying_. "Let's hope that this is just a fluke, and not the beginning of a trend. If it is, we could be in trouble." __  
><em>

"In other news."_ said Numbuh 11, "the notorious villain Captain Clean was arrested today in Washington by grown-up police. It seems that a local operative, thinking he had nothing to lose, complained to his parents that Captain Clean had repeatedly attacked him in the past. It's hard to say what will come from this. KND enemies have rarely been apprehended by grown-ups before. I hope that adult prisons are up to the job of holding them. As far as I know, they're never been tested before."_

_"We'll find in the next few days.", _remarked Numbuh Ten_, "Meanwhile we received word today that Father was released from prison. We urge all operatives to stay on their guard. As anyone who lives near him knows, Father has a nasty habit of retaliating after being defeated. The last time, this involved-_

A slamming noise made Nigel turn his head. His father had come home.

"Evening, Nigel!" said Monty briskly, entering the room. "How was your day?"

"Not good, dad," admitted Nigel. He described the Lunch Exchange Crash and the fight with the Bullying Syndicate.

"Ah." said Monty delicately once Nigel had finished. "All in all, a rather difficult day, it seems. But I've got something that may cheer you up. Come with me, I''ll show you."

Wondering what Monty had in store, Nigel got up.

Monty led them to his bedroom. He went straight to a wall to the left of the entrance and pressed a small white knob, the type used to control lighting. Instantly a large section of the wall pivoted on itself, pushing Nigel and Monty behind it. They found themselves sliding down a wide metallic chute, similar to the KND tunnels at Gallagher. Eventually, after a minute, the chute terminated in a dark round hall.

Nigel stood up curiously and looked around. From what he could make out, the walls and ceilings of the room were made entirely of thick tree roots. They must be at the bottom of a tree. The chamber's perimeter was lined with barrels, crates, and several rundown robots. The only other feature in the room was a circular wooden platform.

Nigel gasped. He had heard of this place. He knew it from legend. It was the resting place for the Book of the Kids Next Door. "I don't believe it." he whispered. "The book really exists."

Monty made his way towards him, holding a small book in his hands. "Nigel." he said proudly. "This...is the Book of Kids Next Door." He held out the artefact. Hands trembling, Nigel took it. He ran his fingers over the book. As he did so he felt a rush of comfort and hope. Turning to the first page, he saw that the book was very ancient: the pages were brittle and yellowed, and the spine was threatening to separate from the pages in some places. The book must have been created thousands of years ago, at the beginning of the first age of the Kids Next Door. Just like the stories had said.

"This book, Nigel", explained Monty, "can inspire kids to resist adult tyranny. It also protects the owner from magical attacks and instructions on how to build exceptionally useful technology. Oh, and it gives you a complete account of the Kids Next Door's history. Every mission, treaty, and battle that has ever occurred is described in these pages."

Nigel stroked the front cover of the manuscript. As he did so he felt a rush of warmth and comfort. "Do you think I should give the Book to Global Command?"

"I think you should keep it with you. It will protect you from magical attacks, and its strategic and tactical advice is outdated." Monty told him. "Consider it a little recommissioning present.

"Just think of all the things we could do with this book." said Nigel with reverence. "A vaccine for the cooties, an alternative to taking baths, maybe even a cure for the Delightful Children."

"Healing the Delightful Children would be extraordinary." asserted Monty. "Quick, check the book to see if it has a cure for brainwashing. Go on, I'm sure it does."

Nigel began flipping through the book's dusty pages. "Let's find out. Brainwashing, brainwashing, severe cases...cure for...ah, here we are! Page 528. The only remedy for severe cases of brainwashing is...huh, interesting."

"What is it?"

Nigel's heart sank a little. "The Fourth Flavor. But no one has ever come close to finding it, as far as I'm know."

Monty clapped his hands triumphantly. "Excellent, we go can questing for it this weekend! It'll be our first adventure together. What do you say?",

"I say that's the best idea I've heard all day." replied Nigel, laughing on the inside. "Although I am a little worried. How will we go about finding the Fourth Flavor?"

"We'll ask the Ice Cream Men, it's their field of expertise. I'm sure they'll cooperate. If not, we can easily get them arrested."

Now Nigel felt like laughing on the outside. "Well what we are waiting for? Let's go questing now!"

However, Monty shook his head, looking serious this time. "No. This can wait until the weekend. We both have work to do."

Nigel wanted to protest, but he knew Monty was right. The world wouldn't stop existing if the Delightful Children remained insane for a few more days, and this adventure required time-time which wasn't available during the week. "Point taken." he grumbled.

"Oh, and before we head back up, I've got something else to give you." He extracted a blue plastic watch from his pocket and handed it to Nigel.

"It's a two-way watch." he explained. "I've got the other one (as Monty spoke, he attached a similar watch to his wrist). "If you ever need to contact me, just press the dial."

Nigel examined the watch and tried it. Instantly the white and black dial was replaced by his father's face. "Wow. I can't wait to see the look on Numbuh Two's face when I show him this!"

* * *

><p>The next day, as they sat down to lunch in the cafeteria, Nigel showed the Book to his friends. They seemed fairly impressed except for Abby and Wally.<p>

"Can it really inspire operatives?" she asked. "Have you tried it?"

"It works on me." Hoagie offered. "I want to go out and take Evil Adults Industries by storm!" The top of Hoagie's head was exposed, and he was wearing a pair of cheap, substitute goggles. His ordinary goggles and cap were still being held by Dixie, despite Hoagie's best efforts to locate her.

"Well Numbuh Five sure don't feel inspired." observed Abby.

Nigel eyed his second-in-command for a moment. He was disappointed by her lack of faith. But perhaps all she needed was a little persuasion. "I think you need to have a little faith in the first place, Numbuh Five. I know it's not easy, but try it."

"Ah, forget this inspirational crud!" intervened Wally. "Can the Book do anything useful?!"

"That depends, Numbuh Four." said Nigel coolly. "What's your idea of useful?"

The Aussie hesitated and scratched his head. "Ah don't know...can it tell us what causes cooties?"

"Unfortunately, no. However, the Book does say that cooties can only be transmitted through kissing. If an infected person touches you, it won't do anything."

Abby sighed in exasperation. "How many times does Numbuh Five have to tell you guys? There is no such thing as cooties!"

Hoagie and Wally loudly expressed their indignation at such faithlessness, but Nigel ignored them. His ears had just detected a familiar voice coming from the kitchen. "Everyone be quiet!" he ordered, alarmed. "I've just remembered something. This is the day of the month when Grandma Stuffum attacks!"

The words had hardly left his mouth when the wall between the cafeteria and the kitchen exploded. Out of the resulting gap came Grandma Stuffum and an army of disgusting ingredients.

"Oh Kids Next Door!" the villain called in her odious Polish accent. "It's time for your monthly feeding. Come to Grandma Stuffum!"

Nigel groaned. He had forgotten that Stuffum's monthly attack was scheduled for today. But there was no time to act regretful. Despite some misgivings, he quickly shouted his battle cry. In the confusion, no one saw Sector V slip into five secret tunnels placed in the cafeteria walls. Moments later they returned in full KND attire. Four of them were carrying stun blasters. They pointed them at Grandma Stuffum and fired. But their efforts were in vain, for Stuffum, yielding an asparagus staff , expertly deflected every one of the incoming beams. Concurrently, Wally fired a giant bowling ball, at her but Grandma stepped out of the sphere's path just in time.

For twenty seconds they kept up a barrage of fire, then paused. It was no good: the blaster beams were ricocheting off the staff and narrowly missing them.

"It's no good!" realized Nigel. "We need to surround her to land a shot. Numbuh Four and Numbuh Five, go to Stuffum's left and right! Numbuh Three, Numbuh Two, keep firing around her."

Abby and Wally rushed forward, but something stopped them in their tracks.

An enormous creature had slithered through the hole in the wall. Sector V drew back in fear. It was some sort of giant spaghetti monster, fifteen feet wide and reaching to the roof of the cafeteria. It was coated in green sauce and possessed innumerable long arms, in the form of spaghetti tentacles. Two black olives, half-buried in the mountain, served as its eyes. Upon closer examination, they realized the green sauce was spinach.

"You've hit a new low, Stuffum!" growled Nigel. "Only a sick, demented person would coat spaghetti with spinach sauce!"

"Ah, but vis is a special occasion!" she laughed. "It is my last attack!"

With surprising speed for a creature of its mass, the spaghetti mountain slithered towards the other side of the cafeteria, tentacles extended. Wally and Abby tried to finish off Stuffum while they had the chance, but the monster shot out tentacles which coiled around their bodies. The two operatives didn't put up much a fight, confidently expecting that they could tear the strands without trying. But to their horror, they found the tentacles were hard as steel. They were trapped.

"Guys, get out of here!" yelled Abby. "This spaghetti's like metal. We can't get free!"

"We're not leaving you behind!" retorted Nigel. He, Hoagie, and Kuki bombarded the spaghetti creature with blaster fire, but their hits had no effect on it. Before long, they were too had been immobilized. All of them were carrying L.A.S.E.R.S. in their pockets but unfortunately they couldn't reach them. The bonds were too tight.

"Well this is just great!" said Wallly sarcastically. "Any ideas, guys?!"

"Vell, Vell!" gloated Stuffum. "Now that you are all wrapped up, it's time to eat!"

With a wave of her right hand, she summoned her legions. They had lost.

"Hey, Grandma!" cried Hoagie valiantly. "Why do you want feed my friends? I bet I can eat all of your food by myself and more!"

"Oh _really_?" replied Stuffum, her voice laced with deadly sweetness. "Open vide, then!"

She pointed her finger in Hoagie's direction, prompting her waiting food to charge.

While this was going on, Nigel contacted Numbuh 362 on his comlink. "Numbuh One to Numbuh 362, come in!"

Thankfully, she answered promptly. "I'm here. What's going on, Numbuh One?"

"Grandma Stuffum is attacking us. We need help!"

"Are you sure?" said Rachel, sounding very surprised. "You never ask for help."

"Well we need it now!" Nigel pleaded.

"I'll round up some guards from the Moonbase, but it'll be at least ten minutes! Numbuh 362 out."

Meanwhile, food poured into Hoagie's mouth, from liver and brussel sprouts to moldy potatoes and hairy sausages. Yet the pilot weathered the storm, even stretching his head to the sides to nab ingredients within reach. "Is that the best you can, do?" he taunted between two mouthfuls. Flustered, Stuffum accelerated the attack pace of her ingredients. After a minute, Hoagie began to visibly falter. His breath came in gasps and he was letting the food come to him. He hung on for another twenty seconds, then shut his mouth. He had reached the limits of his food-absorbing capacities.

"Well, it looks like the fat boy has had his fill!" cackled Stuffum. "Now it is time for the rest of you."

She redirected her food towards the four other operatives. Before the army could attack, however, the green beam of a stun blaster hit Stuffum in the forehead. Four more shots followed, and she crumpled to the ground. A second later, bereft of its creator's will, the spaghetti monster fell inert.

Released from their bonds, the five operatives turned around to see who had saved them. To their astonishment, standing near the cafeteria doors was Mary Uno. She looked quite happy to be here.

"Mom?!" shouted Nigel, wide-eyed and excited. "What are you doing here? How did you know we were being attacked?!" She looked completely unruffled, and was almost smiling. Nigel found this behavior unusual and disconcerting, until he remembered that Mary was an adult. As such, she couldn't be expected to act like an ordinary operative.

"I had a phone conversation with several parents this morning." replied Mary gravely, closing the gap between them. "They wanted my help with talking to Sauerbraten and getting rid of Stuffum, because apparently she attacks you once a month. So I decided I would lend a hand."

"Nigel, why didn't you tell me Stuffum was scheduled to attack today?" she continued, casting a critical eye at her son. "I could probably have stopped this battle before it had started."

He shrugged ruefully. "Sorry, mom. I completely forgot. I had other things on my mind."

Nigel and the others then looked at her in awe. "Well don't just _stand_ there!" Mary exclaimed. "Get changed, quickly! You can't let the teachers see you in military attire."

They took the point and hurried towards their respective tunnels. As they did so, Rachel came back on Nigel's comlink. "Numbuh One, what's your situation?"

"We took care of Grandma Stuffum, sir. We had some help from Numbuh 999."

"Good! I'm glad she's proving useful. But I'm sending reinforcements anyway. They'll take Stuffum to the Arctic Prison."

"Understood, sir."

"Oh, and Numbuh One, I want to see you in my office later today."

Nigel gulped. He had a sneaking suspicion this was about his parents' recommissioning. "Um, Okay. What time?"

"Fifteen hundred hours. Wait outside the school entrance. I'll send a ship to pick you up."


	8. The Supreme Leader's office

By the time Sector V returned to the cafeteria, things had returned to normal, except for some minor collateral damage. Nothing out of the ordinary. However, they decided to guard Stuffum's body until she could be taken into custody.

After a few minutes, they heard the family roar of a S.C.A.M.P.E.R. outside the cafeteria.

rapidly approaching the cafeteria. "That must be our back-up." said Nigel.

With a great crash, the emergency doors at the back of the room were blasted apart. Then their faces fell. Five persons pushed through the entrance, but they weren't KND operatives-they adult policemen, led by Lieutenant Stewart. Silently and nervously, the adults scanned the room. As soon as they detected Stuffum's body, they rapidly moved towards her.

"Wait a second!" exclaimed Nigel. "What's going on?! You can't take Stuffum away. She belongs to us!"

"Yeah!" added Abby. "And where did you guys get a S.C.A.M.P.E.R. anyway?"

The Lieutenant shrugged and took out a pair of handcuffs. "The army confiscated a lot of your SCAMPERS yesterday. I have friends in the Pentagon, so they gave a SCAMPER to my police district this morning. Now if you don't mind, we'll be taking this lady with us. It's our job, in case you didn't know."

Nigel drew himself up to his full height of 4 feet 10 inches. "Your job? Since when have you ever cared about arresting criminals?"

The lieutenant looked like he'd been slapped in the face. "I don't need any lectures from you, Nigel. We've accomplished more in the past forty eight hours than the Kids Next Door has in its entire history."

"That's not true!" shouted Nigel. But the lieutenant ignored him. He and his men began to drag Stuffum away.

"Hey, guys, what do you think he meant by that 'you'll be hearing from us again' remark?" said Wally once the policemen had left the cafeteria.

Before the others could answer, a series of cries broke out in the hallway. It appeared the reinforcements had arrived and were also attempting to take charge of Stuffum .

"Don't get in our way, kids!"

"Not until you let Stuffum go!"

"Absolutely not! She's going in our custody!"

Nigel rushed into the hall, where Numbuh 35 and Lincoln were at each other's throats. "Let them go, Numbuh 35." he said firmly. "If we don't cooperate with them, they'll probably call your parents."

The sandy-haired boy backed away, looking shocked. "They wouldn't."

"Oh yes we would." said Steward heatedly. He turned to his men. "Come on, boys, let's get moving. On the count of three, everybody pull!"

Nigel and Numbuh 35's platoon watched them go in disgust. "Just like an adult to show up when all the work is done!" seethed one operative.

"Hey, it could be worse." reasoned Numbuh 411. "At least they're still allowing us to do our job."

* * *

><p>Compared to lunch, the early hours of the afternoon were uneventful. Privately, Nigel enjoyed the change. Though he liked fighting adult tyranny, he also liked peace and quiet from time to time.<p>

He looked to his right, where Kuki was sauntering down the corridor. She seemed to be in a good mood, maybe because she was looking forward to English class. Then again, she was always in a good mood.

"Hey, Numbuh One", inquired Kuki, "will we be rebuilding our treehouse? We can't be in the Kids Next Door without a treehouse, right?"

Nigel nodded stiffly. "Of course, Numbuh Three. I just need to talk to Global Command and ask for some building material. I'll ask them today, I think."

Kuki assumed her usual, wide, smile, causing Nigel to chuckle to himself. That was one of the good things with Kuki. She was very direct with her emotions, so that when she smiled, you knew she wasn't hiding anything.

"Oh, that's great!" she rejoiced. "By the way, thanks again for digging out my rainbow monkeys. I was really worried about them."

"It was nothing." said Nigel affably. I know how much you care about them. I'm sorry about about , by the way."

The purple rainbow monkey had been partially trapped under a closet in the wreckage. When Nigel had tried to pull him free, the doll's right arm had ripped off.

Kuki sniffed. "It's okay. He'll live."

"You know, Numbuh Three, I have-hey, is that Numbuh 362?"

For the Supreme Leader had just sprinted past them in the opposite direction, looking flushed and anxious.

"It is Numbuh 362!" confirmed his teammate. "She looks kind of worried."

"Hey, Rachel!" shouted Nigel, "what's wrong?!"

She skidded to a halt. "I can't talk now, Nigel. Something's happened to the Museum of Really Cool Artefacts." Then she resumed running until she turned a corner. She was probably heading to the girl's bathroom. From there, a pole led to her personal hangar, deep under the school.

"Well that was strange. I wonder what's wrong with the Museum?" Nigel mused.

"Do you think someone tried to attack it?" offered Kuki.

"Probably. I'd like to go to the Museum right now and find out what happened, but we can't do that anymore."

But Nigel was to find out what had happened soon enough. Thirty five minutes later, during English class, Rachel contacted him via comlink. He excused himself and went out in the hall.

"What is it, sir?"

"I've got some bad news." Rachel said grimly. "An adult villain just attacked the Museum of Really Cool Artefacts and burned it down ."

Nigel felt his heart leap into his throat. "What?"

"I know." said Rachel. "It's hard to believe, but it happened. The museum is gone; there's nothing left but rubble. It happened about forty five minutes ago. That's why I was in a rush."

"Any casualties?" asked Nigel, fearing the worst.

"No, thank Zero. Numbuh 101 is a little shaken up, but he's fine."

Nigel clenched his teeth in anger. The artefacts, the statues, the history of the Kids Next Door...it was all gone.

"But why? What villain was it?"

"We're not sure. He looked sort of like Father except he had red eyes, red boots, and was wearing a red cloak. And he had fire-based powers."

"Then it has to be Father." declared Nigel confidently.

"I don't think so, Numbuh One." retorted Rachel. "After the fire was put out, we sent a strike force to the Delightful Mansion to arrest him. We found him, all right, but someone had got to him first.

"Meaning?"

"Someone wiped out of his memories recently. He can't remember a thing."

The magnitude of this latest revelation left Nigel speechless for a moment. The Kids Next Door's most powerful enemy was crippled, possibly for life. Another addition to the growing list of things that had never happened before.

"How did he do it? How did the attacker wipe out Father's memories?" he finally asked.

"He used a hippo blaster."

Nigel drew in a sharp breath. "Weren't those outlawed by the Disneyland Convention?"

That comment elicited a derisive snort from the Supreme Leader. "Nigel, who cares if they've been outlawed? Do you seriously think the person behind these attacks cares about what's legal or not?"

"No of course not." retorted Nigel sharply. "But who would be willing to use a hippo blaster?"

"Probably the same person who burned down the Museum. We questioned the neighbors; they claim they saw a man wearing a red cloak go into the Mansion yesterday afternoon."

Nigel tried to think of something positive to say. "Well, at least this rules out Father as a culprit. I guess Joe Balooka was right; he was sure that Father was innocent."

"Good for Joe." remarked Rachel briskly. "He'd make a great KND operative if he wasn't so obsessed with hall monitor duty. I have to go, Numbuh One, but I'll see you in forty minutes."

* * *

><p>At 3:00 P.M., as agreed, a S.C.A.M.P.E.R. (piloted by Numbuh 35) picked Nigel up in front of Gallagher. Five minutes later, he stepped out on the polished surface of the Moonbase hangar.<p>

"You know how to get to the Supreme Leader's office, Numbuh One?" checked Numbuh 35.

"Yeah, sure."

"Great. See you later, then."

Nigel could have used the M.A.G.L.E.V. (Machine Always Guarantees Levitation Enables Efficiency) train to get to his destination, as he frequently did, but this time he chose to go by foot. Monday's attack had reminded him of how cool and unique the Moonbase was. In fact, he was in the mood to explore every corner of the station, from the Auditorium and the Cafeteria to the Mission Control Room and the gumball cannons. But there was no time; Numbuh 362 was waiting for him. He had to face his fear.

He walked into the Supreme Leader's amphitheater to find her barking out orders on the big monitors. "Numbuh 300! What happened? I told you not to go in alone!"

"Numbuh 465, where's the rest of your team? I sent you to the beach to stop those bullies, not to go swimming!"

"Numbuh 80, I thought your parents had agreed to let you stay in the Kids Next Door! Didn't they?!"

Rachel turned her head and saw Nigel walking down the aisles. "There you are, Numbuh One! Follow me. And you, Numbuh 60, take over for me."

Numbuh 60 was seated at a table thirty feet to the left of the computers, bent over a stack of papers that reached well above his head. At Numbuh 362's command, he dutifully took her place.

Rachel led him to the bottom right corner of the amphitheater.

"How did you manage to get out of school early?" asked Nigel.

"The usual excuse. I told my teacher I was sick."

She pressed her hand against the wall. A flash of blue electronic lightning illuminated the metal barrier. Then, with a clicking sound, the wall slid open. Rachel moved forward and ushered Nigel into a spacious, very clean office. He looked around curiously. It was still decorated to Chad's tastes: the walls were plastered with posters of football players and superheroes, the carpet under his feet was green, white, and red, and there was a military plane model on the desk. Evidently Numbuh 362 hadn't had time to settle in yet.

Th Supreme Leader dropped into a recliner behind her desk and took a deep breath. "Have a seat, Numbuh One." she said, pointing to a swiveling chair in front of him.

Nigel obliged. He noticed there were dark circles under Rachel's eyes, and felt sorry for her. She'd wanted to be Supreme Leader ever since becoming a cadet, but she had never expected to take the helm at the most critical time in the KND's history.

"You look tired, sir." he observed.

"I _am_ tired." the commander responded. "This job is more than I can handle. I'm going to try drinking coffee. Otherwise, there's no way I can keep this up."

"Are you sure drinking coffee is a good idea? I mean, it's supposed to be extremely addictive."

"Yeah, well...desperate times call for desperate measures."

_The time is 3:10_, droned a black alarm clock on the desk. _Time to take a cookie break_.

"Oh, and that reminds me." said Rachel, pushing a plate of chocolate chip cookies towards him. "Here, have some cookies. I'm sorry, I don't have any milk to go with them."

"Thanks." replied Nigel, pleasantly surprised at the special treatment.

"As I was saying." Rachel continued curtly, "I have some questions to ask you. I know that your parents were recommissioned by Cree, a few days ago."

She sat up and the sternness of her expression increased. "Tell me the truth: did you help Cree steal the recommissioning device?"

"No sir." said Nigel earnestly. "I would never cooperate with a teen ninja, or steal something from the Kids Next Door. Cree acted on her own. Honestly, I'm not even sure how she knew that my mom and dad were operatives."

The harsh expression quickly softened. "Oh good. I won't be needing this anymore!" So saying, she tossed a brown envelope labeled 'Nigel Uno' on her desk into a garbage pail.

"What was that?" said Nigel.

"A dishonorable dismissal form. It's the penalty for consorting with a Teen Ninja."

"Wow. You don't kid around with the rules, do you?"

Rachel gave a mirthless scoff. "I'm just doing my job. I can't start making exceptions, even for you."

"Right." agreed the boy. "Anyway, I wanted to ask you something. About my parents-

"I know what you're going to ask me." she cut him off. "They won't be decommissioned. Actually, I've decided to abolish decommissioning. The whole point of the system was to keep the Kids Next Door secret, but now that the whole world knows about us, it's kind of pointless."

Nigel sighed in relief, feeling that a great weight had just been lifted from his shoulders. "Thanks. That means a lot to me." He took a bite from a cookie. It was warm and chewy, and deliciously soft, too. Then the full significance of what Rachel hit him. But Numbuh 362, what will happen to the Kids Next Door?! Every teenager who keeps their memories will betray our secrets to the adults!"

"I don't like it anymore than you do." answered Rachel resignedly. "But we have no choice. Parents won't tolerate decommissioning anymore."

"So what will we do?"

For the first time, Rachel looked pleased. "We'll talk to the parents of the teens that do betray us. That should keep them quiet. But anyway, that's not the reason I brought you here. I need your advice."

"My advice about what?"

She picked up a cookie and tapped it against the desk rhythmically. "I've been thinking. The same person who attacked the Moonbase probably attacked the Kids Next Door museum."

"Are you saying it isn't Father?"

Rachel shook her head. "I've read his file. Burning down buildings isn't his style. Neither is killing operatives. And it's not Wink and Fibb. And then we can go surfing in Honolulu. The waves there are great."

Nigel frowned in confusion. "Say what, now?"

The girl ran a hand over her face slowly. "I'm sorry, Nigel. I really need more sleep. What I was saying is, it's not Wink and Fibb. They were giving a scuba diving lesson at the time of the attack, and no one present saw them use a phone."

"Do you mean Munster or Oswald? The ones who are probably his friends?"

"Yeah, them." nodded Rachel, crossing her hands. "Now, the man we're looking for probably has fire-based powers. I've arranged a meeting between the two suspects and Numbuh Two in three day's time, but I doubt they'll tell the truth. We need to find a way to trick them into revealing their ability. Any suggestions?"

Immediately an idea rolled off Nigel's tongue. "How about we try covering the door of their house in ice? Then when he gets home, the guilty person will have no choice but to use fire to melt it."

"That's not bad." considered Rachel. "But he won't use his powers if everyone on the street can see him."

"Okay, then. What if we put bugs in their houses? Eventually the culprit will betray himself."

"I doubt that the culprit will say anything revealing, Numbuh One. And even if he did, it would take too much time."

Sector V's leader racked his brain for more ideas. "I got it! Why don't we question the Delightful Children? They should be happy to bring in the person who attacked Father."

Rachel gave an impressed nod. "That's a pretty good idea. In fact, I'll send an operative to question them right away."

"I think my dad may have some suggestions. I'll ask him right now." He pressed the knob on his watch and waited for Monty to answer. But the face remained blank. "He's not answering." said Nigel eventually. "I'll try again later."

"See that you do, Numbuh One. We need to catch this criminal before he strikes again."

She lay back in her chair and ate a cookie silently. "By the way, how's the trial coming along?"

Nigel's eyes wandered from the posters to his superior. He was about to ask what it was like to be Supreme Leader, but Rachel spoke first.

"I suppose you'll be needing a new treehouse, won't you?"

"Yes, sir." said Nigel. "I was going to ask for some construction material, actually. And a new ship."

"You've got it." said Rachel affirmatively. "After you leave, I'll ask The Quartermaster to bring some equipment to your house." She stood up, indicating the meeting was over.

He imitated her. "Thanks for the cookies, sir."

She smiled faintly before putting her helmet back on. "Any time, soldier."


	9. Warnings and flight

Before he could leave the office, Nigel had a realization. "Wait a second, Numbuh 362!" he exclaimed. "Why don't we just use the recommissioning module on Father?"

Rachel grimaced uncomfortably. "That's not an option, Numbuh One. We don't have the recommissioning module anymore. Numbuh 99 shredded it after he took it back from you."

"He did _what_?!" said Nigel in a tone of outrage.

"He thought the device was too dangerous to be kept." explained Rachel. "At the time, we thought he was right, so I backed him up."

Nigel sighed. "Never mind then." He saluted the Supreme Leader and took his leave.

As he was approaching the Moonbase Hangar, Monty's face appeared on his watch. "Sorry for the delay, old boy. I was in a meeting."

"No worries, dad. I called because the Kids Next Door need your advice."

"Before you say anything, I'm afraid I've got some bad news from home."

"Again?! What is it now?"

"Numbuh 91's parents just called your mother. They've made up their minds; they're taking you to court. The session takes place on Monday afternoon, at 5."

Nigel felt his heart beat a little faster. He wasn't surprised that the Scotts had carried out their threat, but the prospect of going to court still frightened him. "So what should we do?"

"I'll explain when I come home. But that's not all. I think it's time you and I paid a visit to Father."

"It's too late for that, dad." said Nigel dispassionately. "Someone got to him before us." He explained what had happened to Father and the Museum of Really Cool Artifacts.

"I can't believe it." breathed Monty. "I suspected Father wasn't to blame, but I didn't think anyone could get the drop on him."

"Neither did I, but someone did. And we need your help on the case."

"I'd be happy to help, but now's not a good time. We can talk tonight."

"Understood."

* * *

><p>Rachel made good on her promise. Half an hour after their meeting, a SC.A.M.P.E.R. from the Moonbase arrived at Nigel's house, bringing a C.R.A.N.E. and a truckload of building materials. Delighted, Nigel called Hoagie to help and the reconstruction proceeded.<p>

While Nigel piloted the C.R.A.N.E., Hoagie guided his actions from the ground, using a series of blueprints. It required adroit steering and very careful attention to detail, but one by one the various walls, roofs, and branches were fixed into place.

By the time the kids stopped for the day, after three hours, the new treehouse was one-third complete.

"Well done, Numbuh Two!" exulted Nigel. "Hopefully by next week the treehouse should be finished, and we can get back to work."

"I guess so. And I thought we were never gonna rebuild the treehouse, too." Hoagie reflected. "But what are we gonna do about the S.C.A.M.P.E.R.? The grown-ups are sure to come and confiscate it!"

"What grown-ups? The army?"

"Yeah!"

"Oh no they won't, Numbuh Two!" said Nigel smugly. He gestured towards their ship. A thick white-blue rope wrapped around the width of the structure. It extended from the S.C.A.M.P.E.R and fully encircled Nigel's house. "Before you arrived, I connected my house to the S.C.A.M.P.E.R. with some bluerpleberry superglue. If the army wants to take the ship, they'll have to tear apart my house. And the only people on earth who know how to dissolve bluerpleberry superglue-

"are the Kids Next Door." finished Hoagie. "It's genius!"

"No, Numbuh Two. It's just part of being a sector leader."

* * *

><p>Half an hour later, as twilight fell over Cleveland, Nigel and Monty sat down on their house's rooftop.<p>

Nigel pulled out a paper which Rachel had emailed him an hour ago. It was a list of individuals most likely to have attacked Father. In fact, he was itching to discuss the investigation, but there was a boring item of business on his agenda first.

"What should do for the trial, dad?" he began, folding the paper in four. "How do we defend ourselves?"

"I'm afraid I can't do much to help you; I'm no legal expert." admitted Monty. "All I can suggest is that you show some remorse and ask your superiors to vouch for you. And above all, tell the truth."

"And if we do that, we won't get punished?" said Nigel. He reclined on the roof, taking in the orange sunset.

Monty nodded slightly. "I think so, Nigel. Common sense is on your side, after all. But just be aware that life is full of surprises. Some of them are good, and others are bad. All you can do is learn to bounce back from the bad surprises."

Nigel rubbed the back of his head, not exactly satisfied. "I wish I could go back in time and fix my mistakes, instead of having to bounce back." He felt Monty's hand clap him on the back.

"You can fix your mistakes without going back in time. At least to a large extent." Then Monty cleared his throat. "Let's talk about the Moonbase investigation, shall we? What's happened since the Museum burned down? "

Nigel straightened up a bit. "Well, we sent Numbuh 70 to question the Delightful Children this afternoon. They were happy to help once we told them that Father had been attacked."

"Of course. Whoever this attacker is, he did us a big unintentional favor."

"Right. And so the Delightful Children gave us a list of suspects, which is right...here (Nigel lifted the paper in his hand). "All of them carried serious grudges against Father."

Monty took a moment to study the list. There were only four names written down:

_Four-Eyed Joe_

_Kechura Marta_

_Philip Munster_

_Anne Cruel_

"Hmm." Monty's mustache furrowed. "Two of these people here seem to have female names. Isn't our villain a man?"

"Not necessarily." countered Nigel. "_He_ could be a woman in disguise. He was wearing a mask at the Museum, after all."

"I suppose you're right. So it could be any of these four people."

Nigel looked at him. "Any ideas on how to identify them?

The older operative fell silent. For a good half-minute he tapped his fingers on the roof slates and stared into the dimming horizon. Then his thoughtfulness metamorphosed into exuberance. "I've got it!" he said aloud. "I have a plan, but it will require impeccable coordination. It involves investigating all four suspects at the same time. Listen carefully. "

Monty exposed the strategy he had conceived. By the time he finished Nigel was grinning from ear to ear. "It's brilliant, dad! There's no way this can fail. Except (he grew slightly less confident) how do we know where all these bad guys live?"

In response, Monty help up a small black notebook. "That's taken care of. When Father was arrested, he was carrying this agenda. The police was kind enough to, er, lend it to me." He skimmed through the agenda. "All the home addresses of his main subordinates are in there. What we need to do now is to make sure the Supreme Leader approves of my plan."

Nigel stood up and activated his rocket boots. "I'll get on that."

"Good man." approved his father. "If you need me, I'll be watching the _Nightly News_."

* * *

><p>Monty sat down on the living room sofa. With great eagerness, he pressed a secret code on the remote which gave access the <em>Nightly News<em> channel. After so many years of being decommissioned, watching the program was a delight.

The program's theme song played, then its main background appeared.

"Good evening, everyone." began Numbuh 10. "_Our first topic tonight: falling manpower. Because of relentless parent pressure, the total number of KND operative is shrinking. Ours numbers stood at 1850 on Tuesday and 1250 last night. Tonight, they've shrunk to 900. If you haven't been forced to resign yet, don't give in! The world still needs us. A lot of villains have been captured in the past few days, but more than half of them are still out there. And the ones that are behind bars could break out. We don't recommend going behind your parents' back, but you can compromise. Tell them that you'll stay out of the more dangerous missions, stay away from fieldwork. If that doesn't work, ask your parents for a little more time, or point out that it won't do any good to resign-villains will always manage to find you."_

_"In other news", _Numbuh 11 continued_, "the Japanese government has actually outlawed the Kids Next Door. We now take you to Sector Rising Sun, whose treehouse is being blockaded by the military."_

The scene cut to Sector Rising Sun's treehouse, located in a suburb of Osaka. The treehouse was surrounded by dozens of tanks and armored cars. At the bottom of the house, the sector's leader was engaged in a heated discussion with an army officer.

Nick was standing in the middle of the screen, microphone in hand. The reporter pushed his microphone towards one of Sector Rising Sun's operatives, who was standing right next to him.

"Numbuh 3.14, the military seems to be very hostile towards you. Do you have anything to say?"

Numbuh 3.14 adjusted her helmet gravely. "Well they're obviously working for Father and his people. It's a very clever plan, using the military to achieve their devious goals. I guess it was going to happen sooner or later. But whatever happens, I can you tell this: we won't go down without a fight!"

Before she or Nick could say anything more, however, the TV turned to static.

Then it cleared up, but the _Nightly News_ had been replaced by a very different channel. At the middle of the screen, a man wearing a scarlet cloak and hood sat in a recliner chair. Except for his eyes, which burned red, his face was shrouded in darkness.

Monty tried switching to another channel and back, but it did no good.

A spotlight illuminated the individual and his chair. Otherwise, the screen was completely dark.

"Hello, Kids Next Door." The man began. His voice was high-pitched and raspy. "My name is Godfather. Sorry for interrupting your_Nightly News_, but I have a very important announcement to make. If you're smart, and I know that most of you aren't, you'll listen carefully."

As he spoke, 'Godfather' telekinetically summoned a sheet of paper into his hands. After looking at the paper briefly, he resumed speaking.

"I'll get straight to the point: all of you are incredibly badly behaved. You represent everything that's wrong with kids. You don't help out your parents around the house, you don't respect your elders, and you expect adults to give you everything you ask for. Worse, you're setting a bad example to ordinary kids. And I won't even get into the astronomical property damage you cause every you fight with your so-called villains. I've been seeing this for twenty years, and I'm sick of it. You need to change. And the only way to do that is by disbanding the Kids Next Door. Don't laugh. I'm serious. Leave the Kids Next Door this second and put it behind you, permanently. You've been living on a cloud, kids. Its time to step down and get back to the real world. Instead of always spending your time playing and having fun, learn to take some responsibility. Help out your parents with the cooking or the laundry. Don't leave school in the middle of the day to fight villains. If you must keep your 2x4 technology, use it to help children who really need it."

Monty knew Mary and Nigel would probably want to see this, but he couldn't tear himself away from the TV, not even for a few seconds.

"If you don't take my advice, I'll have to destroy the Kids Next Door piece by piece. And the first thing I'll do is to get rid of the code module. In two days, on the stroke of midnight, I'll find the module and destroy it. And if you don't think I can do it, know that I attacked the Moonbase and the Museum."

"Think carefully about this. Leave the Kids Next Door now and nothing bad will happen to you. I know you took an oath to protect kids until you reach thirteen, but things are changing. You're not needed anymore; you can let the adult police handle things. And if you're in it for the fun, you'll have a lot more fun being normal kids."

"I'm sorry for the background, by the way, but this is what the world will look like eventually, if we leave it in your hands."

"That's all I have to say for now. If you don't listen to me…well, don't say I didn't warn you."

Godfather pressed a button on his remote, and the screen reverted to _Nightly News_.

Monty turned off the TV and sat there in a state of stupor. At that moment, Nigel came running into the room "Dad, quick, turn on the TV! Someone has hijacked the Nightly News!"

"I saw it, Nigel." said Monty collecting himself. "And it looks like we'll be needing my plan very soon."

"I have to tell my friends. I'll see you at dinner."

* * *

><p>With that, Nigel raced up the stairs and into his room. He opened a drawer at his desk and retrieved an emergency holographic transmitter. It contained four red buttons. He pressed all of them at once.<p>

A moment of waiting. Then, one by one, they materialized, standing on circular platforms connected to the small black box by thin blue bands.

"Yo, Numbuh Five here!"

"Ah'm here, Numbuh One! What's goin' on?"

"Hi, Numbuh One! Oh boy, this is fun. I can't believe we're finally using the holographs!"

"All right! Let the holographic discussion begin!"

"Thanks for answering so quickly, guys." said Nigel grimly. "You won't believe what happened: someone lunatic just took over the KND _Nightly News_."

His words were met by a collective gasp.

"Please tell Numbuh Five you ain't serious!"

Wally clenched his fists. "First the museum, now this! What's gonna happen next?!"

Hoagie gave a feeble chuckle. "You're joking, right?"

"It's no joke, Numbuh Two. He's the villain who attacked the Moonbase and the museum. He calls himself Godfather. He thinks that we're all spoiled rotten, and that we should give up being KND agents. And that's not all. In two days, at the stroke of midnight, he's going to try to destroy the Code Module."

Kuki's face scrunched up. "He wants to destroy the Code Module? Oh, that's horrible!" And she hugged her favorite rainbow monkey for comfort.

"He's bluffing." scoffed Hoagie. "He doesn't even know where the Arctic Base is. Does he? "

Abby leaned forward, hands resting on her knees. "Wait, just so Numbuh Five gets this clear. Did you actually see this guy talk, Numbuh One?"

"No." said Nigel, straightening up. "I only know what Numbuh 362 told me. She saw the speech. But I think that Numbuh 10 caught the speech on tape, so you'll be able to see it yourselves tomorrow."

"Oh right. Gotcha." Abby relaxed a bit.

"But Numbuh One, Godfather could be lying! Maybe he's just trying to scare us." pointed out Hoagie.

"I don't think so, Numbuh Two. If he hijacked the Nightly News, he's smart enough to steal the Code Module, or at least attempt to steal it. And we can't let him do that. If we lose the code module, we won't be able to recruit any more operatives. It will mean the end of the Kids Next Door."

"So what are we gonna do now?" pondered Hoagie. "Should we move the Code Module to the Moonbase?"

"Not necessarily. If we capture Godfather before his deadline, we won't have to." said Nigel.

"But how?" questioned Kuki.

Nigel smiled. "Fortunately, my dad has come up with a plan."

He exposed the idea that Monty had conceived. "And I talked to Numbuh 362." Nigel concluded. "She supports the plan. She said she'll contact me once she's found other sectors willing to participate."

Hoagie and Kuki looked thrilled. The others, not so much.

"Sounds awfully complicated, Numbuh One. Not that Numbuh Five should be surprised, or anything. But anyway, say we find Godfather. What if he decides to attack you the second he sees you?"

"That's where we're depending on you, Numbuh Five. You have to be ready to take him down as soon as he makes a move."

"As soon as he makes a move...repeated Abby uneasily. "No pressure, huh?"

"Uh Numbuh One", said Wally, fiddling his fingers, "how come Numbuh Five and Numbuh Three don't have ter disguise themselves? Why does it have ter be us?"

"Because, Numbuh Four, we only need three people inside the suit. And we need someone strong in case we have to walk around, which means you."

"But where the crud are we supposed ter get a black suit with yellow eyes?" inquired Wally.

"That's easy." retorted Nigel. "We'll just use Father's black suit.

"Wait, wait.." interjected Abby. "Hold on. Father wore a suit? Are you saying he's actually human?"

"Yes." stated Nigel calmly. "I know it sounds incredible, but I saw it for myself at the Deep Sea Science Lab."

Sector V's leader heard his mother call for him. "Nigel, come to dinner!"

"I have to go, guys. Make sure you get some sleep tonight. We have to be in top condition for tomorrow."

They exchanged goodbyes, and he turned off the transmitter.

* * *

><p>"So, I hear decommissioning has been abolished." Mary remarked as she set the table for dinner.<p>

Nigel raised his head from a Yipper comic book. "Yes, it has. Unfortunately."

"Unfortunately? I wouldn't'…" But Mary broke off. She grew distressed, and placed a hand on her forehead. "I don't understand." she whispered.

Nigel sprang to his feet, startled. "What's wrong, mom? Are you feeling sick?"

She took a deep breath, removed her hand, and relaxed. "It's all right. I just forgot what I was going to tell you. It's frustrating, but it happens sometimes.

That didn't exactly allay Nigel's concern. How could his mother completely forget what she was going to say? That had never happened to him. She couldn't be getting old-she was only in her mid-forties. Maybe she'd had a long day? "You should probably get some rest. You must be really tired."

"No, I don't feel tired. I'm sure I'll remember my point later."

* * *

><p>Despite her best efforts, Mary still had not recovered her idea by the time Nigel went to bed, two and a half hours later. At this point, she opted to temporarily push the problem aside and challenged Monty to a game of chess.<p>

"I'd forgotten how good you were at this game." commented Monty twelve moves in. He had created an impressive v-shaped line of pawns, but one of them (near his queen-side) was undefended. Now, virtually of Mary's pieces had converged onto that weak spot. Once the pawn was taken-and that was about to happen-his line would surely unravel. "It's a shame you never kept your old trophies."

"I know." reflected Mary. "But after I was decommissioned, I lost all interest in chess. I couldn't understand why I had trophies, and it really aggravated me. So eventually, I threw them away."

"Thank goodness today's generation of operatives won't have to go through that."

Monty looked up brusquely from the board, where he was preparing a daring counterattack. He hated talking about decommissioning, but the subject was impossible to avoid. All of his memories from the past twenty-seven years were shrouded in fog. He could see them, but only to a very limited extent. And too often he didn't like what he saw: a man full of energy and good intentions, but hopelessly timid and oblivious. It felt like these memories belonged to a stranger-like the real him had died at thirteen and been reborn a few days ago. "They are very lucky. But why stop with decommissioning? We can rid the world of adult tyranny-completely. All we have to do is to destroy Ben's company. Without Evil Adult Industries, there will be no one to equip and fund most villains. They'll be forced to abandon their life of crime."

"You're assuming that Evil Adult Industries only has one manufacturing center." contested Mary. "Grandfather had multiple factories, remember?"

"Yes, but we destroyed all of them."

"The point is, destroying the White Tower won't do much good if the enemy relocates to another base. If you ask me, we ought try to make peace with Evil Adults Industries. It's our best guarantee of security."

* * *

><p>Next morning, at school, they discussed how the rest of the KND had reacted to Godfather's appearance. As it happened, Sector V was one of the very few units not to receive the news with with panic or frenzy.<p>

"So how are we gonna defend the code module, Numbuh One? Has Numbuh 362 told you yet?" Abby asked Nigel.

The British boy shook his head. "No, she didn't. I think I'll try asking her now."

"But before you do that, Nigel", said a smug voice, "you have some business with us."

They turned their heads or bodies. Cadorna was standing there, arms crossed over his chest and looking very satisfied.

Wally clenched his fists and took a step forward. "What are you doing in school, eh? Looking for another beating?"

"Actually, I just want to talk to Nigel for a few minutes. Alone."

Nigel cocked his head slightly. "Why?"

"It's a private matter." said Runt. "You'll understand, trust me."

"All right, fine." agreed Nigel. "But this had better be important." He turned to his friends. "Go ahead without me, guys. I'll catch up."

"Are you sure this is a good idea, Numbuh One?" asked Abby doubtfully.

"If I need any help, I'll call you." he replied. He began walking away with the robbers, but Hoagie stopped them.

"Hold on a second. I want my mask and goggles back, shorty! Where are they?!"

"You can have them back on Monday. Not before." said Runt casually, not bothering to look at Hoagie. Then he beckoned to Nigel. "Follow me, Numbuh One." He led Sector V's leader into a classroom some a hundred fifty feet down the hall. The room was empty except for Lunk.

"What's this about? Make it fast" demanded Nigel once the door had clicked shut.

"The Six Gum Gang had a little talk yesterday." said Runt with mounting haughtiness. "We still want you and your friends to pay us back for the Yipper cards we lost. But we know you probably don't have enough cards or money. So we're just gonna settle for some you technology instead. Understood?"

It was Nigel's turn to cross his arms over his chest. "You must have drunk too much cactus juice. There's no way we're giving you Kids Next Door technology.

Runt smirked. "I had a feeling you were gonna say that. But how would you feel if told the whole school that Nigel Uno has a rainbow monkey?" He brandished a large photo of Nigel in bed, hugging a blue rainbow monkey.

Nigel shook his head, horror-stricken. "Where did you _get _this?"

"Let's just say we have some powerful friends." said Lunk. "Don't even think about it." he added as Nigel lunged forward. "We have five more copies in reserve."

Runt tapped his fingers on the desk he was sitting on. "So what'll it be, partner? The photo, or your tools?"

"All right look," said Nigel, raising his hands in a conciliatory gesture, "I need some time to think this over."

"Fair enough." agreed Runt. He produced a pocket watch and tapped its glass face. "It's 9:05 A.M. right now. You have until 9:05 A.M. on Monday to make your decision. That should be plenty of time. And don't bother running to your mom this time. She can't help you."

Predictions and possible solutions raced through Nigel's mind as he left the room. If he gave the the Six Gum Gang 2x4 technology, he would surely be thrown out of the Kids Next Door. But it he allowed the photo to go public, he would be known for the rest of his days at Gallagher as the boy who liked rainbow monkeys.

It didn't take long for his friends to notice was something was amiss. Nigel tried to pass off his behavior as nervousness regarding the upcoming mission, but by lunchtime the game was up.

"Come on, Numbuh One. said Abby firmly. "We know something's wrong. And don't tell Numbuh Five it's about the mission today, cause she knows that ain't true."

"Yeah." said Hoagie. "You haven't even touched your peanut butter and jelly sandwich, and they're your favorite."

"All right, fine." conceded Nigel. He looked around furtively to ensure no one was listening. "I have a secret that you can't tell anyone. I…own a rainbow monkey."

Wally spit out his soda over the table. "You _what_?!"

Hoagie stared at him with a crestfallen expression.

Kuki was briefly overcome by surprise, then a wide smile came over her face. "Oh Numbuh One, I'm so happy for you. You're the first boy I know to have one! What's his name?"

"It doesn't matter what his name his." Nigel said. "The point is, the Six Gum Gang wants me to give them 2x4 technology as payback for their yipper cards. If I don't give it to them, they'll show everyone a photo of me holding my rainbow monkey. What am I supposed to do?"

There was a long moment of silence. Everyone contemplated their plates.

"How many Yipper cards did they lose in the Crash?" Hoagie asked. "I could give them some of _my _cards. They're still good."

Nigel looked at the pilot gratefully. "Could you give them some of your own cards?"

"Yeah, sure. If it'll get them off your back, I'll do it."

"But Numbuh One, I don't understand!" intervened Kuki. "What's wrong with owning a rainbow monkey?"

"They're supposed to be for girls, Numbuh One!" replied Nigel.

Kuki's innocent expression vanished, to be replaced by one of palpable indignation. "No they're not! They're for people who want to discover _love_ and _kindness_!"

"But no one else at school knows that."

"So just tell them!" insisted Kuki.

Nigel stared into nothingness, the cogs in his mind processing the diversionary officer's argument. "You know what?" he realized. "You're right! I will tell them!"

Wally was aghast. "Ya can't be serious, Numbuh One. What about yer reputation?!"

"I'll take my chances, Wally. It isn't worth giving in to blackmail."

Abby and Hoagie shared a glance full of foreboding.

"I hope you know what you're doing, Numbuh One." said Nigel's second in command.

* * *

><p>The man known to the public as Philip Munster walked up to his front door; he thrust the key in the lock and twisted clumsily. The rapidity of Munster's gait as he entered his home betrayed his mood. Of late, work had Evil Adult Industries had become highly stressful. The company was being subjected to increasingly aggressive probes by the police. Today, for example, 189 of their employees had been arrested. Half of their shipments (containing, among other things, plutonium, jet packs, and candy cannons) had been intercepted and confiscated. A platoon of police officer in Fraser had demanded to inspect their headquarters. Munster had managed to keep them out by claiming that the officers needed a written authorization. But in a few days at most, they would be back.<p>

He needed a drink. As Munster crossed the living room on the way to the kitchen, however, something stopped him in his tracks.

Father was seated in one of his antique wooden chairs. "Surprised to see me, Philip?" he asked.

Thanks to years of weathering KND ambushes and workplace betrayals, Munster managed to completely mask his shock. "What are you doing here?" he said, feigning irritation. "Shouldn't you be in a hospital?"

"I want to know why you attacked the Moonbase."

"You mean you haven't figured it out?" spat the former financial director. "I wanted to get rid of you! For sixteen years I've been watching you drive Evil Adult Industries into a hole. I'm fed up with your moronic plans to take over the world. All I want-

The sound of multiple triggers being cocked caused Munster to forget what he was about to say. He shoved forward his hands, palms spread. A second later, multicolored beams of energy and ice shot towards him from every corner of the room, seemingly out nowhere. But the beams bounced off an invisible wall before they could hit him. He didn't stop to counter-attack or to identify his aggressors. Instead, he dashed to the wall next to his chimney and punched a small white button which had been designed for this kind of this emergency. The floor under Munster's feet slid away, revealing a secret tunnel. He deflected more beams of energy, then he was gone.

In the living room, his disappointed attackers revealed themselves. They were Sector W, two members of Sector T, Kuki, Abby, and Mary Uno. None of them attempted to follow Godfather down the tunnel. Though they yielded state of the art equipment, it wouldn't be enough. The tunnel was almost certainly rigged with traps. And-though they didn't say it-most of the operatives were terrified of facing Godfather.

"What happened, guys?" lamented Numbuh 149. "It was eight to one and we had the element of surprise!"

"Numbuh One's question about the Moonbase made him suspicious!" groused Numbuh 85, tossing aside his C.H.A.M.E.L.E.O.N. (**C**ool **H**elmets **A**lways **M**ake **E**mptor Literally **E**vanesce **O**pponents **N**onplussed). "You should have been more subtle."

'Father' took off his black suit, revealing Hoagie, Nigel, and Wally in disguise. "My questions weren't the problem, Numbuh 85." Nigel retorted. "Godfather must have seen us get up. The C.H.A.M.E.L.E.O.N.s don't make us fully invisible, remember?"_  
><em>

"He's right, Numbuh 85." intervened Mary. "And besides, it doesn't matter if Godfather escaped. The important thing is that we discovered his identity. It's only a matter of time until we capture him."

But her words had a pleading quality that made them ring hollow.

Nigel walked to the tunnel and studied it carefully, wondering where its other end might be. "I hope you're right, mom. I really do."

**Comments? Suggestions? Bring them on!**


	10. Decisions

"Numbuh 362? It's Numbuh One reporting on our mission."

While Nigel spoke, most of the operatives were shuffling out of Munster's home. Their mission was finished.

"I'm listening, Numbuh One. Fire away."

"It was Munster. He's Godfather. You can call off the other ambush teams."

"It was Munster? You're absolutely sure? Were you able to capture him?!" said Numbuh 362 excitedly.

"No sir. It was definitely him, but he got away. He was much too powerful to be stopped."

"Oh. I see. Well, you've found our culprit. Congratulations." It was tremendously awkward hearing the disappointment in Numbuh 362's voice.

"Thank you, sir. I suppose that our next move should be to defend the Code Module. Godfather will surely try to make good on his threat."

"Yes, sir. He probably knows that we'll put the Code Module on the Moonbase. Which means we need a plan to defend the Moonbase."

"Yes, he will. But don't worry. I suspected Godfather might get away, so I've been thinking of a plan since last night. I want you and your team to report to the Convention Stadium tomorrow morning at 9 o'clock sharp. I'll explain what I have planned."

"Understood. Numbuh One out."

He signed off, and noticed that his teammates were looking at him expectantly. "What's our next step, Numbuh One?" asked Abby.

Nigel stood to his full height. "There's a meeting tomorrow morning at 9, at the Convention Stadium. Numbuh 362 will explain our plan for defending the Moonbase. In the meantime, I suggest we go home and get some sleep. We're going to need it."

While they dropped off the others at their homes, Mary was absorbed in thought. Once they were alone, she turned towards him. "Nigel, I've been thinking."

"Oh yeah. About what?"

Her mouth opened, but strangely no words came out, as if she couldn't spit out what she had to say. Finally she spoke. "I think there may be a way to avoid tomorrow's battle. It's time we tried to make peace with Evil Adult Industries."

Nigel looked at her incredulously. "Make peace? Seriously?"

"Why not?"

"The're not interested in living side by side. Wake up and smell the hot chocolate! They just want to take over the world and make our lives miserable. Besides, even if they were willing to negotiate, we want to capture Godfather. He has to pay for what he did. But if we catch him after making peace, it'll be back to open war."

"I understand the problem." said Mary patiently. "But there is a solution. If someone other than the Kids Next Door were to capture Godfather-say, the police-you could not be held accountable. Am I right?"

Nigel pondered this idea. "I suppose you are. But the adults would need to trust us in order for this plan to work. Do you think they will?" It occurred to Nigel that he himself had little faith in the police. But his lack of trust was justified. The police only had a few days of experience fighting Evil Adults Industries, compared to more than thirty years for the KND.

"I'm sure they will. You've been playing this game for much longer than they have. But anyway, one step at a time. First, your father and I will visit the Black Factory tonight to see if the bad guys are open to negotiations."

"You don't have to go there in person." Nigel remarked. "You can contact them on their computer monitor."

"I know." nodded his mother. "But I believe we'll make a bigger impact if we go to the Factory."

* * *

><p>A few minutes later, Nigel lay curled up in front of the TV when Monty contacted him by signal watch.<p>

"Ahoy there, old bean."

"What's up, dad?"

"I've been meaning to talk to you about decommissioning." He said in a down-to-earth tone.

Nigel pushed the bridge of his glasses against his nose. "What about it?"

"Well, it's…uh…I." Monty massaged his forehead, looking bewildered.

"What's the matter?" enquired Nigel.

Monty's moustache bristled. This happened whenever he was angry. "I…I don't know. I completely forgot what I was going to say. I'm terribly sorry."

"You forgot?" Nigel repeated suspiciously. "Are you sure?" That was precisely what had happened to Mary yesterday. Were his parents losing their minds? Or was the incident just a harmless kind of lapse which only affected adults? For now, he chose to believe the second option.

"Yes, I'm sure." Monty assured him. "But as soon as I remember what I wanted to say, I'll tell you."

"Understood."

* * *

><p>At 9:00 P.M., Monty and Mary judged that the time for action was right. They boarded their S.C.A.M.P.E.R. and took to the skies, heading west. The flight was brief-after scarcely ten minutes, Monty brought the ship to a halt. They were in Colorado, above the Rocky Mountains. A mile beyond them, on a mountain overlooking the town of Fraser, loomed a great fortress. Essentially, it consisted of two structures. The first was a crenelated outer wall, six miles long and surrounded by a water-filled moat. Every twenty-five feet or so, an elite ice-cream man paced to and fro. There were also searchlights every thirty feet, strong enough to reach Fraser.<p>

The second structure was a massive square made of black stone. It rose two miles into the sky and was large enough to accommodate the Convention Stadium. The square's vertical surfaces were pierced by hundreds of narrow windows and gun turrets, while a handful of thick smokestacks covered its roof. Otherwise, the building exterior was featureless. This was the Black Factory, the headquarters of Evil Adult Industries and the nexus of adult tyranny on Earth. It was here that nearly all villainous equipment was manufactured. Decades ago, the KND had sent a five-hundred ship armada to destroy the fortress. It was their first attempt to do so-they had learned of the base's existence only two weeks before. It was also their last, for the place was protected by scare machines which amplified one's fears a hundred-fold. A fifth of the ships committed had crashed after entering scare machine range. The remaining vessels had attacked the White Tower from a distance, but their long-range weapons were simply not powerful enough to inflict serious damage.

Monty set the S.C.A.M.P.E.R. down a good distance away-guns protruding from the ramparts were clearly visible. Before heading out, they took a moment to look over the fortress.

"Good heavens, it's hideous." commented Mary, appalled.

"Yes." said Monty in the same tone. "Knowing Ben, it must be an homage to Pappy. But let's not waste any more time." He held up a small round object, roughly the size of a billiard ball. "Do you have your gravity warper?"

"Yes. But I doubt we'll get very far." said her husband.

He was right. As they drew near the Fortress's east gate, one of the sentinels took aim at them with a bazooka-like gun.

"Don't shoot! We're on a diplomatic mission!" yelled Monty, waving his flag. The guard fired anyway. His aim was true-Monty and Mary were hit and covered in a strange, multicolored material which prevented all movement. As it happened, the material was still connected to the weapon which had emitted it. Now the guard turned a cranking device on his gun, and Monty and Mary were reeled towards him.

When they had reached the wall, the ice cream man released them. "I know who you are." he said in a tone where aggressiveness mingled with curiosity. "You're Numbuh One's parents. What are you doing here?" By this point, six of his coworkers had joined him. All of them were pointing inhibitor guns at the visitors.

"In case you didn't notice the flag", replied Mary, turning the first guard's weapon away from her "we're here to offer peace. We want to talk to Godfather. Where is he?"

"You're in luck." The same guard replied. "He's in the fortress right now, I think." He activated a walkie-talkie. "Supreme Chairman?"

"Who is this? I'm in the middle of something."

"I know sir, but Numbuh One's parents are at the fortress, near the South Gate. They say they want to discuss peace terms. Should we let them in, or take them hostage?"

At once, Godfather's irritated tone was replaced by one of utter delight. "Numbuh One's parents?! Really?! Put them on, quick."

Mankerman extended the walkie-talkie towards Mary, and she promptly snatched it. "Is that really you, Philip?"

"Yes, Mary, it's me. I'd love to catch up, but now's not the best time. We're about to start a game of capture the flag."

"You've come a long way since we were twelve." remarked Mary, not really listening to him.

"Do I detect a note of disapproval?"

"Philip, why in the name of the fourth flavor did you do it?"

"Do what?"

"You know what. Attack the Moonbase."

"I thought I made that clear in my speech. I want to get rid of the Kids Next Door."

"Then why didn't you-

"Target the Code Module from the start? Because I didn't know it existed. No one told me about"

"Oh come off it. You mean to tell me that you, the third most powerful man in Evil Adults Industries, weren't aware of the Module's Existence?"

"I know it sounds strange. But Father kept me in the dark. We weren't getting along at all."

"Is that why you got rid of him?" Monty asked soberly.

"More or less. For several years now I've had a plan to weaken the Kids Next Door-the plan I used Monday. But I could never enact it while Father was breathing in my neck. I waited because we were friends, and he kept me telling he would come up with something better. But he never did. And when he got arrested, I lost patience."

Mary and Monty hesitated while absorbing this information, but they weren't satisfied.

"This still doesn't justify committing murder." launched Mary.

"_Murder_? It was an act of war, Mary. I attacked a military station, manned by military personnel."

"Military personnel?! They were children, not soldiers."

"No, they're soldiers. Look at the weapons they use and the training they receive. Not to mention the indoctrinating."

"I don't care. Soldiers or not, they were still children. Most of them were 8 or 9 years old!"

"That's irrelevant. The point is, they were acceptable targets."

"How could say you something like that? An 8 year old is never an acceptable target."

Godfather heaved a long sigh. "Look, I suggest we continue this conversation another day, or else we'll be here all night. Let's return to the reason why you're here, shall we?"

"As you wish." agreed Monty. "We want to stop the war between your company and the KND. If Evil Adults Industries shuts down, we, as the parents of KND operatives, will make sure that our kids are well behaved. Interested?"

"Hmm. Well, I applaud your initiative." retorted the villain coyly after a moment of silence. "I can't remember the last time we looked for a diplomatic solution. I'll tell you what: we can hold talks on Sunday."

"Sunday? You're just trying to wait until you've captured the Code Module, aren't you?" admonished Mary.

"Exactly. And don't try to lecture me, Mary. I know you wanted to do the same thing today. You were going to capture me and then use me as a bargaining chip in the negotiations. Isn't that right?"

Mary was taken aback by his discernment, but only briefly. "Perhaps, does the great and powerful Godfather really need a bargaining chip?"

"Well actually...yes, I do. The Kids Next Door are a tenacious bunch. They won't just surrender. I could probably outsmart them, but not if you two are helping them."

A heavy silence hung in the cool night air. "And this is your decision? There's nothing we can do to change your mind?" said Monty tersely.

"It is, and no. But I'll tell you what: I'll let you tour the premises if you wish. Under escort, of course."

"Very kind of you, Godfather, but I think I'll pass." Monty answered dismissively.

Mary rubbed her chin thoughtfully. "I'm not interested in a tour, Philip, but I'd like to speak with you. Are you free on Sunday night?"

"Sunday night? Maybe. Where would we meet?"

"Somewhere quiet and out of the way. On Neptune, for example."

"I need to think about it. I'll get back to you, Mary. In the meantime (his voice became imbued with a hint of irony) have a nice weekend."

* * *

><p>Nigel was up early the next morning. Of course, he was always up early on Saturday mornings-it meant more time for him to watch cartoons,play video games, or play soccer with the neighbors. But this Saturday, he needed to report to the Convention Stadium.<p>

He made his way into the kitchen to find some breakfast. Both his parents were there.

"Morning old chum!" said Monty, who was studying a blueprint of the Moonbase. "You should get something to eat. It's already 8:30."

"Aren't you coming to the meeting as well, dad?"

"No, I've got work to do." he said. "But I'm meeting Numbuh 362 later this morning."

"I should like to help her direct the battle tonight." he added with a smile.

Nigel took out some cereal and glanced at his mother, who was busy solving a chess puzzle. "What about you, mom? Are you coming to the meeting?"

Mary shook her head. "Sorry, Nigel, I can't. I've got a meeting with the police commissioner nearest to Evil Adults Industries in about an hour. I'm going to try to convince him to tear down that tower."

"Be careful not to fly too close to the fortress." warned Nigel. "If the adults see, you could get attacked. In fact, dad, can you give your watch to mom? If she gets in trouble, she can contact us immediately."

Monty took the point and entrusted his watch to Mary.

"Thanks, dear." she said. "I appreciate it. By the way, when you're meeting with Numbuh 362, make sure to tell her that Godfather's threat could be a bluff."

"A bluff?" inquired Nigel.

"I mean, it's possible that he'll attack the Moonbase before or after midnight, or another day."

"Oh right, I get it! Actually, we have thought about that." acquiesced Nigel. "We can't really do anything if Godfather shows up before midnight. But, if he shows up afterwards, we'll know very quickly. Numbuh 74.2's department is modifying our walkie-talkies, by adding an alarm mechanism. He should be done in forty eighty hours. The idea is simple: if there's an emergency on the Moonbase, all the ranking officer needs to do is press a button, and it will activate the alarm on every operative's walkie-talkie."

Mary looked up from her puzzle. "Wow. I wish I'd thought of that."

"I know, me too. Rachel's brother came up with it, apparently."

* * *

><p>When Sector V reached the inside of the Convention Stadium, some forty minutes later, the first thing they noticed was that the majority of the stands were empty. A quick count indicated to Nigel that there were perhaps three hundred operatives present-a far cry from what he had expected.<p>

At the podium, Rachel was waiting, flanked by Patton. For some reason, a black cable ran from her head to the stadium's big screen.

"Rachel, what's going on?" Nigel hissed on his comlink. "How many operatives are there in the stadium?"

"320."

"That's it?!" yelped Sector V's leader. "The last time Father attacked the Moonbase, he had four hundred ships. And each of his ship carried three people, which means we'll be outnumbered one to four.

"I can't help it, Nigel. We've lost 90% of our original manpower. This is all that's left. Now sit down; the meeting's about to start."

"Quiet down, everyone!" the Supreme Leader shouted through a megaphone. Multiple conversations were going on, but they quickly subsided.

"Thank you! You know why I called this meeting. The Code Module in danger, and it's up to us stop Godfather from taking it. This may be the most dangerous assignment you will ever undertake. If you want to back out, you can still do it now."

Rachel then paused and waited expectantly, but everyone stayed in their seats. Nigel felt a surge of satisfaction. His teammates were clearly being inspired by the Book of KND, though they didn't know it. After she had waited long enough, the Supreme Leader resumed.

"Here's the plan. Half our manpower will be in space, in S.C.A.M.P.E.R.S. They'll be divided into six squadrons. Each squadron will try to draw the enemy ships back to Earth. That way, hopefully, we can avoid any casualties and collateral damage to the Moonbase. They'll have the advantage of numbers and firepower, but our ships are more maneuverable. So look for places where you have lots of maneuvering room. Meanwhile, the other half of our manpower will be manning the Moonbase's artillery."

As Rachel spoke, the video screen displayed an exact simulation of her plan.

"If the enemy gets past our ships, the gunners will be the second line of defense. I want you to hold your fire until the last minute, to lure the enemy into a state of complacency. If you have to retreat, head to prepared defensive positions inside the Moonbase."

"The Code Module is in the Decommissioning Chamber. If the adults succeed in getting inside, we've planted coffee bombs in the room. They're loaded with caffeine, which adults can't handle."

"And that's the plan. You're free to go home for now, but I want everyone in the Moonbase Hangar at 2:00 P.M. We're going to run drills for the rest of the day. Any questions?"

Only Numbuh 417, Numbuh 65, and Numbuh 83 raised their hands.

"Yes, Numbuh 417?"

"Who decides which group we are going to be in?" he asked in a ponderous German accent.

"You'll get to decide this afternoon, in the Moonbase. If the groups are unbalanced, I'll decide who goes where." Next Rachel fielded Numbuh 65's question.

"Yeah, I'm not trying to scared to sound scared or anything, but what happens if we gets captured? What will they do to us?"

"They won't do anything." Patton assured. "You'll be released immediately. They have no choice. They have to answer to the public now."

Numbuh 65 made a snorting noise. "Yeah, right. If that's true, why hasn't Evil Adults Industries been shut down yet?" A wave of dissatisfied agreement rippled through the crowd.

"We're working on that." said Rachel heatedly. "Numbuh 900 is trying to convince the adult police to storm the Fortress. I'm sure she'll succeed. She's one of our best operatives, and the police have gotten a ton of complaints from parents asking them to shut down Evil Adult Industries."

That seemed to satisfy the Supreme Leader's public, so she moved on. "Numbuh 83, what was your question?"

"Um, wouldn't it be a good idea to have some fake Code Modules ready?"

"We're way ahead of you." Patton intervened. "We've created hundreds of decoy books, which we'll scatter all over the floor of the Decommissioning Chamber. The villains will never know which one to take!"

There were no more questions, so the assembly was dismissed.

"You guys get the SCAMPER ready." Nigel told his team as they emerged into the hallway. "I need to have a word with Numbuh 362."

He moved away from the crowd, until he felt sufficiently isolated. "Numbuh 362? I had a suggestion for our battle plan."

"Actually, don't leave, Nigel. I need to give you something. Where are you?"

"Second level, entrance 17."

"I'll be right there."

Footsteps behind him drew his attention. He turned around, and to his surprise found himself looking at his father. "Dad? What are you doing here? I thought you had work to do."

Monty gave a forced chuckle. "Actually, I had a change of plans. I wanted to talk to the Supreme Leader right now."

"She'll on his way, so you shouldn't have to wait too long."

"Excellent."

« How does it feel to see the Convention Center again ?» asked Nigel.

Monty pulled out a black pipe and light it. « It feels rather disappointing, actually. Since we moved our headquarters to the Moonbase, there's not much to see here. The place has been stripped bare.»

« Well maybe, but the view's pretty nice. Wouldn't you agree ? »

« Not really." said the adult, shaking his head. "I much prefer seeing the earth to seeing New York."

Nigel squinted his eyes. For some reason, Monty sounded bored. Was something on his mind? Or maybe the conversation topic didn't interest him. That must be it. «But you can't really see the earth from the Moonbase." he insisted. "I mean, it's quite small."

«I suppose so.»

They stood in awkward silence for a moment.

« Anyway », remarked Monty loudly, « what do you think of your new Supreme Leader?"

« So far, she seems to be doing a good job. She had the Moonbase dried up in record time, she saved at least two hundred of our ships from being confiscated, and she's well organized. Mind you, so was Numbuh 274, but he tended to get ideas mixed up in his head. »

« I've heard that she doesn't like operatives who take the initiative. » said Monty, taking a conspiratorial tone.

Nigel made sure they were alone before answering. He had no intention of criticizing Rachel and then finding out that she was standing right behind him. «I don't know about that, but she definitely needs to learn to delegate a bit more. She's doing way too much on her own these days. Every time an operative is about to resign from the KND, she thinks she has to be there in person. Heh. And then she wonders why she's so tired."

« Hmm. Well in any case, I look forward to meeting her. »

Nigel looked at his father curiously. « Didn't you already meet her on Thursday ? »

« Ah, speak of the devil ! » exclaimed Monty.

For Rachel was striding through entrance 17. "I'm glad you're here, Numbuh Zero! I've decided to officially welcome you and Numbuh 900 back into the KND. And to seal the deal, here's a comlink." She extended her right hand, palm open.

Nigel leaned forward to get a closer look at the comlink. But even as he did so he felt a sharp pain in his neck. His hand closed in on the source of the discomfort: it was a black dart. He pulled it out, but found himself growing awfully drowsy. Meanwhile, Rachel had also been hit with a dart and was wobbling on her feet. "What just happened?" he whispered before everything went dark.

* * *

><p>A splash of water. It felt cold.<p>

"Nigel! Nigel wake up!"

He opened his eyes. The rest of Sector V was gathered around him. By the looks of it, they were worried sick.

"All ya all right, mate?" asked Wally. "What happened?" The shorter boy handed him his glasses, which had apparently fallen off.

He performed a quick check of his surroundings. Rachel and his father were gone. "Where's Numbuh 362 and my dad?" He had no idea what was going on. Someone had hit them with anesthetic darts . But who? And how could they not have seen the attacker?

His friends stared at him, their expressions blank. "We haven't seen Numbuh 362 since the meeting ended, boss." stated Abby. "And I don't think any of us have seen your dad today. Why?"

"Something happened to them, and I don't know what." said Nigel, feeling panic creep up the back of his neck. His comlink was deactivated: he turned it back on. "Rachel. Come in. Where are you?" He waited with baited breath. Hopefully she still had her comlink. If she did, his questions would be answered in a matter of seconds.

"I'm afraid Rachel isn't returning any calls at the moment." came a familiar voice.

"Godfather. What have you done to her and my dad?"growled Nigel.

"Oh, Rachel's free, don't worry." Godfather assured cheerfully.

A fragile bubble of hope welled up within Nigel. "She's free?"

"Oh, she's free all right. Free to walk from one wall to another."

"So you kidnapped her. What about my dad?"

"Monty? He's fine. He was never in the stadium; I disguised myself as him."

The information gave Nigel much needed relief. But it also raised a major question. "How did you do it? How could you have disguised yourself that well? It's not possible."

"I believe you're familiar with Battle Ready Armor." the villain said in a tone even smugger than Cadorna's.

"I've heard of it. But I thought it was just a myth. How does it work?"

"Now Nigel, that would be telling, wouldn't it?"

"Numbuh One, who are you talking too?!" inquired Kuki, flailing her sleeves around in an agitated manner.

Nigel waved her away impatiently and pushed the speaker button on his comlink. "What have you done with Rachel?"

"I've put her in a prison of my choosing."

"Where? At the Black Factory?"

"No, not there. Good try, though."

"How do you I know you're not lying?"

"If you don't believe me, you're welcome to search the Fortress." Godfather offered. You can take as long as you want, too."

Nigel squeezed the bridge of his glasses. The proposal could be an enormous bluff. But to what end?

"So where is she, then?"

"You want her back? Then you'll have to give me the Code Module."

The demand was utterly predictable, if unpleasant, so Nigel received it without surprise. "We'll never give you the Module. We don't make deals with tyrans. We'll find Rachel even if we have to comb the entire planet."

"That could take years. Do you really think Rachel's parents are willing to wait that long?"

Nigel bit his lips. "No."

"I didn't think so. Besides, she might not be on Earth. My company has colonized other two other planets, remember?"

"I remember." said Nigel.

"Good, good." approved Godfather, his voice soft and dangerous. "Then we understand each other. If you want Rachel back, meet me at 4:00 P.M. tomorrow, at the coordinates I wrote on the piece of paper. Bring the Module with you."

"What piece of paper? are you talking about"

"I left it on the floor right next to you."

Nigel looked down, to his right. Sure enough, there was a scrap of paper with the following coordinates scrawled on it:

_17°52′S 148°4′W._

"And if we do that-if we bring you the Module, you'll give us back Rachel?"

"You have my word. Oh, and Nigel? One more thing. Don't bother trying to give me a fake Code Module. I know exactly what the original looks like."

* * *

><p>"So that's the situation." said Patton. "Godfather's taken Rachel captive, and he won't give her back unless we give him the Code Module. The question is: what do we do?" As Patton spoke, he solemnly regarded the other members of the emergency meeting: Numbuh 36, Numbuh 74.2, Numbuh One, Numbuh 3-2-1, Numbuh Five, Harvey McKenzie, and his parents. They had created a circle of chairs in the briefing room of Sector W's treehouse.<p>

At Patton's invitation Harvey stirred. "I've got a question. What is _he_ doing here?"(he jabbed a finger in Nigel's direction).

"I asked him to come." said Patton tensely. "Numbuh 274 always valued Nigel's input, and that means I do too."

Harvey gave a loud, sarcastic snort. "Well excuse me if I disagree with your decision. Everything that's happened since Monday is Nigel's fault! He's the one who didn't destroy the age cigar and let the Delightful Children get it. He's the one who spilled the beans about the Kids Next Door! He shouldn't have been invited here!If anything, he should have been fired!"

"I know this must be difficult for you, Harvey." said Patton, sounding gentle but firm. "But I'm the acting Supreme Leader, and I say Numbuh One stays. I'm sorry, but that's my decision."

Harvey clenched his fists. For moment it seemed that he might attack Patton. But the moment passed, and he relaxed.

"Good. Moving on. How can we get Rachel back?"

scoffed. He was a kind-faced but rather unimpressive man; the clothes and glasses that he wore were far too big for him, so that he seemed to float in them. "That's not even a question! We just need to give Godfather the code module. End of story."

"Yes", explained Patton, "but the problem is, , we need that Code Module to recruit new operatives. So we don't really have a choice...

He trailed off, cowed by the look of fury on 's face.

"So what if you can't recruit operatives?!" the woman exploded. "Forget your stupid club! This is my daughter we're talking about!"

"If I could suggest a compromise," intervened Nigel, "my dad recommended that we hide a tracking device inside the Code Module. That way, we get Rachel back. Then, as soon as Godfather leaves, we track him down, capture him, and get the Module back."

"If Godfather doesn't destroy the Module as soon as his back is turned." Numbuh Five cautioned.

"I think we should at least wait a few days before making the exchange." advised Numbuh 36. "Why don't we give Godfather something else besides the Code Module? There must be another object or artefact that interests him. What about the K.N.D.N.A. Tracker?"

Both Numbuh 74.2 and Numbuh 3.2.1. seemed to think this was an excellent idea, but Nigel knew better. He cleared his throat. "I don't think that will work, Numbuh 36. Godfather wants the destruction of the Kids Next Door, and only the Code Module can give him that."

"Then why don't we just a decoy book?"

"No, that won't work either. Godfather knows what the Code Module looks like."

"Why do you guys care so much about the Code Module anyway?" questioned Harvey, who had appreciably calmed down. "Can't you just rebuild it?"

"No we can't." answered Patton. "The Module's been irreplaceable since the sixteenth century."

"Why?"

"Because some operative from that time period lost the Module's replaceability in a game of chess with a witch. It's a long story. I can explain after the meeting if you really want."

Meanwhile Abby had suddenly perked up. "What about the C.H.A.M.E.L.E.O.N.S.?! We could use'em to organize a mass ambush, just like we did yesterday."

But Numbuh 74.2 gave Abby an annoyed glare."Um, no we can't. The helmets are currently de-powered and won't be operational for at least a week. Duh! Everyone knows that!"

"I vote for Numbuh One's plan." declared Patton. "All in favor?"

Everyone raised their hands, except Numbuh 36. "We can't just give up this easily!" he exhorted. "Can't we at least send search teams to look for Numbuh 362?"

"I agree." said Patton. "Here's what we'll do, then." he concluded forcefully, though his voice wavered. "A handful of teams will search the places where Numbuh 362 is most likely being held. On Sunday afternoon, we'll put a tracking device in the Module, and then give the Module to Godfather. As soon as he goes back inside his ship, we'll follow him and shoot him down."


	11. A double-edged sword

"So who's going to conduct the exchange?" asked Nigel. "It needs to be a small group, or else Godfather will get suspicious."

Patton rose to his feet. «I'm way ahead of you, Numbuh 1. The only ones who will come to the exchange are the people in this room. Plus Numbuh Zero and Numbuh 999, if they so choose. But that's it."

«And where is is this meeting point?» asked Rachel's father.

«Somewhere in the South Pacific, sir. I need to check the exact location. I suggest we meet at 3:30 PM outside this Treehouse tomorrow. That should give us plenty of time to get there."

"The South Pacific?" repeated Patton's interlocutor skeptically. « But how are we supposed to get there? Teleportation?»

"No sir. We'll use our standard ships."

"Are they reliable?"

"Of course they are. They can travel faster than the speed of of light, and they're practically indestructible. Believe me, you have nothing to be worried about."

«Okay.» the adult sighed. « I'll take your word for it. »

With that, the meeting broke up.

When Nigel alighted on his backyard, at 11 AM, a barefooted Monty was doing exercises with a boomerang.

Two wooden dummies of an ice-cream man had been placed at the end of the yard, and Monty was attempting to hit them on the head with maximum force. "How did the meeting go, old bean?" he said.

"As well as you'd expect. We agreed to give Godfather the Module."

Monty shrugged sympathetically. "You did the right thing. Will you use my idea, then?"

Nigel bit his lips. "Yeah. Actually, I'm sure your idea will work. I'm just worried about what the bad guys doing to Rachel right now. They could be torturing her. Numbuh 13 says that every time he gets captured, they force feed him spinach."

"They won't torture her. They're not looking to get information out of her."

"I know, dad. That makes sense. It's just that adults rarely listen to common sense. Unless they've been recommissioned, like you or mom."

"You don't trust adults at all, do you?" gathered Monty, neglecting to retrieve his boomerang.

Nigel stared pointedly at the dummies. "No, and I never will."

Monty seemed to have expected the response, for his expression was one of absolute calm. "I'm not surprised. When I was your age I thought the exact same thing. You think that all kids become evil or stupid when they turn thirteen, don't you?"

"Yes."

For some reason, Monty appeared to be embarrassed and delighted at the same time. "Actually, the idea's nonsense. We got the idea from the Book of the KND. Or rather, I did. After we overthrew Grandfather, we had to rebuild the Kids Next Door from scratch. The Book of the KND contained a comprehensive set of rules, so we used them. But the rules were outdated. They were written four thousand years ago, during the 2nd Age. Unfortunately, I didn't realize this at the time. The Book had given us victory. It never occurred to me that some its content could be flawed."

Nigel slowly absorbed this information. He was torn between regret and happiness. On one hand, all their efforts in enforcing decommissioning had been pointless. Worse, it had left thousands of former operatives permanently addle-brained and had heavily contributed to the appearance of the Teen Ninjas. On the other hand, he wouldn't have to fear growing up anymore. He would stay normal after becoming a teenager. It might be less fun, but he would still his old self.

"So we don't automatically become evil after turning thirteen?" he probed, getting to the crux of the matter. "Is that what you tried to tell me yesterday?"

"Yes. And I finally said it! This is great news!"

Nigel lowered his glasses slightly. "But what stopped you from telling me yesterday?"

Monty was about to answer when Nigel's signal watch beeped. He pressed on the knob, and Mary's face appeared. "Nigel, I just spoke to the police commissioner in Fraser. He said that he has no objections to demolishing the Black Factory. It will take a month or so to file the necessary paperwork. But we have his permission."

"But Evil Adults Industries has an army of veteran lawyers. They're bound to try and stop us."

"They won't be able to stop us." said Mary. "They're too deeply compromised. Hundreds of them have been caught attacking children. We have eight taped confessions that Godfather orchestrated the attack on the Moonbase. As far as the adult authorities are concerned, Evil Adults Industries are highly dangerous criminals. They need to be taken down as soon as possible."

"That's great news, mom, but can you tell the commissioner to lie low until tomorrow afternoon? The Supreme Leader's just been kidnapped. Godfather said he would let her go if we give him the Code Module. But until Numbuh 362 is free, we can't risk angering him."

Mary's eyes went wide. "Uh oh? The Supreme Leader's been kidnapped?"

"Yes. I can't give you the details now, but it happened about an hour ago."

"All right." Mary said. "you can explain to me what happened later. I'm off to warn the commissioner." She signed off.

"Right then." stated Nigel, and he faced his father again. "Back to our conversation, dad. Why couldn't you tell me the truth yesterday?"

Monty smiled darkly. "I think I know why, Nigel. I believe that someone has been using a device hidden in my shoes to tamper with my mind."

Nigel looked at the older operative quizzically. "What makes you say that?"

Monty's eyes narrowed and turned to his shoes, which were lying near the back door. "Because when I spoke to you a few minutes ago, I wasn't wearing my shoes. But I was wearing them yesterday. So now, I'm going to do a little experiment. Come on." At Monty's beckoning, they marched to his shoes. Without a word, Monty pulled out a pocket knife and sliced open the rubber heel of his left shoe. Oddly enough, the heel's interior appeared to be hollow. Then Monty pushed his hand into the opening and rummaged around. "Ah ha, success!" he soon exulted.

Monty retracted his hand. He was now holding a pink rectangular object, roughly the size of a USB key. At the middle of its length there was a black circle covered in small holes.

"Wow, that was surprisingly easy." said Nigel under his breath. "Here, let me see it." But scarcely had his fingers closed around the object that it began crumbling to dust.

Monty immediately sprinted towards the house. "Don't drop the device, Nigel! I'll be right back with a freeze gun!" he yelled without looking back.

As Nigel watched helplessly, the object continued to crumble. By the time Monty returned, thirty seconds later, it had been reduced to pile of pink and black powder.

"I didn't think this was possible." uttered the adult. "I've never seen such an efficient self-destruct mechanism before."

"At least we know why you and mom couldn't tell me about decommissioning." deduced Nigel. "Every time you tried to bring up the subject, this device somehow made you forget it." He poured the powder into his pocket for safekeeping.

Monty rested his chin on his fingers thoughtfully. "It must have emitted high-frequency waves which affected the memory part of my brain…in a matter of seconds. That's extraordinarily advanced technology. I think our spies come from another planet."

"Not necessarily." countered Nigel. "Villain technology on Earth has progressed a lot since you were a kid, dad. Although I've never come across something like this before. Hmm...if we performed a spectrographic analysis of the powder, we could probably tell whether or not it came from outer space.

"Quite right. Are you in the mood for some investigating?"

But Nigel was already turning away. "Not today. I want to free Numbuh 362 first."

* * *

><p>It seemed to Nigel that Sunday afternoon would never come. He knew Godfather was perfectly capable of making Rachel suffer for no reason. The attack on the Moonbase had proved that. What had been its purpose? To destroy the Kids Next Door, by forcing operatives to bow to parental pressure and resign? But he could simply have done was he was doing now: eliminate the Code Module. In a sense, Godfather was worse than Father. At least Father's schemes always had a purpose behind them.<p>

To pass the time, Nigel and his teammates scouted the meeting spot. The coordinated provided by Godfather brought them to a large atoll southeast of Tahiti, named Kirabiti. But though they used infrared sensors and ground probing radars, there were almost no signs of human life. The only somewhat interesting things they discovered were a catapult and a granite table. Both were next to each other, in a corner of the lagoon. They seemed in perfect condition, suggesting that someone had been here recently. But this didn't tell them where Rachel was. Nigel wanted to organize a stake out on the island, in the hope of capturing Godfather when he arrived. However, his friends were less than enthusiastic about the idea.

"Gee, I don't know, Numbuh One." said Hoagie. "What happens if we fail?"

"What Numbuh Two said." added Abby. "We are not doing a stake out."

"Why not?"

"Because if we mess up, it'll set back the whole exchange operation. Besides, we couldn't capture this guy on Thursday night, and back then we outnumbered him 15-1. And we had the element of surprise! This time he'll be expecting a trap."

Nigel took her point. Before they could leave, Hoagie took Nigel to the side. "Uh Numbuh One, you remember that trip we took to the magic fountain on Wednesday?" he began fretfully.

Nigel lowered his eyes slightly. Without surprise, he saw that Hoagie was twiddling his fingers. "Yes. What about it?"

"Well, I kind of took a flask of water with me before we left. Just for scientific purposes. And I think some of it's been stolen. Hehe." He cracked an awkward smile.

Nigel almost launched into a tirade, but then thought better of it. It was a waste of energy, and he wasn't in the mood. "Okay, first of all why did you take the water, Numbuh Two? You knew how dangerous it is."

"I know", pleaded Hoagie, "but I really wanted to study its molecular properties. I was gonna get rid of it as soon as I was finished."

"You didn't need to study it. Numbuh 74.2 already took care of that. _Ugh_. And why you think someone stole it?"

At once, Hoagie's voice became that of a detective. "On Thursday night, I had the water in a beaker in my room. I left for an hour. When I came back the water level was lower than before."

"And it wasn't Tommy?"

Hoagie shook his head forcefully. "Uh uh. I asked him; he didn't go near the water."

"Hmm…you didn't find any fingerprints, did you?"

"No. Whoever did it must have used gloves."

Nigel shrugged in resignation. "Well, it's gone. There's no point making a fuss about it."

"So what do we do now?" said Hoagie.

"We need to find out who stole the water. Either someone followed us, or Leaky Leona blabbed."

"I don't think anyone followed us in." considered Hoagie. "There's no way they could have discovered the secret entrance in the bathroom. Not on their own, at least."

"No, I shouldn't think so." the Sector leader agreed quietly.

"Hey guys, are you coming or not?!" shouted Abby, her voice slightly drowned out by the S.C.A.M.P.E.R.'s engine.

"We'll investigate Monday, when we're at school." Nigel declared. "We're not really pressed for time. Whoever stole the water obviously isn't out to destroy the world."

* * *

><p>Sunday morning dawned cloudy. By mid-afternoon, it was pouring rain. Accompanied by Monty, Nigel joined the rest of the expedition in Numbuh 36's SCAMPER, where Patton meant to give a briefing.<p>

"Is it really necessary to have a briefing, Numbuh 60?" wondered Monty. "This operation isn't exactly rocket science."

Patton's mouth opened, then closed. "All right then, I'll keep this short. I want everyone to remember two things. First, do not threaten or attack Godfather until we've retrieved Rachel, and do not get lost on the way to the island. Any quesTIONS?"

"I have one." said Harvey. "Where exactly on the island are we supposed to be meeting Godfather?"

"I've got that covered. Godfather sent us all the necessary information. I'll show you when we get there.

As the operatives went back to their respective ships, Patton took Nigel aside. "Listen up, Numbuh One. I want you, Numbuh Zero, and Numbuh Five to keep an eye on Godfather while we check on Numbuh 362."

"Why?"

"So he doesn't destroy the Code Module on the spot."

"But what chance do the three of us have against him? He's so powerful."

"He may be powerful, but he's not invincible." grunted the Drill Sergeant. "Without his hands he'll be harmless. So try to take out his hands."

A minute later, the small fleet was in the air. It rocketed into space, flew southwest for a thousand miles, and then re-entered the atmosphere. Pushing through a stratocumulus cloud, the operatives found themselves looking at clear blue water.

"Here we are." Said Patton through the radio on Nigel's S.C.A.M.P.E.R. The sun shone brightly on their destination, just a few hundred feet away. But Nigel had to rub his eyes to make sure what he was seeing. Hovering five storeys above Kirabiti was a dark blue dragon, easily ten times the size of his S.C.A.M.P.E.R.

"Numbuh 60, are you seeing that dragon?" he said excitedly.

"I sure do, Numbuh One. It's gotta be Godfather's ship. It can't be an animal, it's not moving." On Patton's side of the line, there was the sound of static. "Okay, everyone. The island is dead ahead. Just follow me."

Numbuh 60 steered his ship towards one of the corners of the atoll's lagoon, which was familiar to Nigel. He looked around once they had disembarked. The catapult and the granite table were still there-they hadn't moved. But there was no sign of Godfather.

All the members of the expedition moved to the table. "He's on this island somewhere." surmised Numbuh 36. "Let's split up and look for him."

"No need, Numbuh 36. I'm here." drawled a familiar voice behind them.

Nigel and most of his teammates did an abrupt about-face. Godfather was standing there, very much at ease. His appearance had changed: he was wearing a business suit, boots, and a full face mask with white globular openings for eyes. Both the clothes and mask were crimson red.

"Where on earth did you come from?" asked Rachel's mother in sheer amazement. "Were you hiding behind the trees?"

"I wasn't hiding. I can turn myself invisible by bending the light waves around me. Impressed?"

"We don't care about your powers." cut in Numbuh 3.2.1. "What's happening with the peace negotiations? Are you still interested or not?"

Godfather's white eyes narrowed, while most of the operatives groaned in annoyance. "Actually we haven't made up our minds yet. Try asking me again in ten minutes, all right?"

"That's enough talking." growled Patton. "Tell us where Numbuh 362 is."

"I'd love to. But first, bring the Code Module a little closer." (so saying he beckoned to Numbuh 36, who was carrying the device in question.)

"Do what he says, Numbuh 36." said Numbuh 60 with a reluctant nod. "Take a few steps towards him."

Looking like he was moving in slow-motion, Numbuh 36 complied.

"Are you happy now?" demanded Abby bitterly.

"Yes and no." said Godfather soberly. "You wouldn't understand."

He pulled a sleek silver remote with one button out of his breast pocket. In the same leisurely manner as before, he turned around, extended his arm towards a large boulder on the beach, and pressed the remote's button. The boulder vanished, and was replaced by Rachel. She was gagged and bound tightly to a chair.

The next instant, almost everyone was rushing pell-mell towards the Supreme Leader. Godfather took the opportunity to summon the Code Module to him as Numbuh 36 passed by. As agreed, Abby, Nigel and Monty stayed where they were, each of them holding a F.R.A.P.P.E As it turned out, Patton had made a wise decision. As they looked on, Godfather dropped the Module and used his right hand to engulf the device in flames. Abby, Monty, Nigel promptly fired their F.R.A.P.P.E.S. at Godfather's hands, but the villain was prepared. He created a huge wall of flames in front of him which melted the ice projectiles. Then, before the KND operatives could re-fire, he squeezed his hands into fists several times, causing all three of the F.R.A.P.P.E.S. to explode. Without pausing Godfather shoved his left hand in the direction of Abby and Monty. They were hurled thirty feet backwards. For some reason, Nigel had not been targeted by the telekinetic blast. Surmounting his confusion, he took out another F.R.A.P.P.E. and squeezed the trigger. This time his blast froze the adult's right hand, but with a wave of his other hand Godfather broke the cryogenic weapon in half. Nigel tried with a M.U.S.K.E.T., and again Godfather dismantled the weapon. Presently Monty came back into the fight and threw his boomerang, but in midair the projectile broke in half. Abby was right behind him. She aimed a B.L.A.Z.E.R. at Godfather, but met with the same result as Monty and Nigel. Then, to Nigel's despair, another telekinetic blast struck Monty and Abby, and this time he was hit too. Meanwhile the Module was still burning.

Fortunately, he managed to arrest his trajectory quickly by activating his rocket boots. Nigel didn't understand why the Book of KND hadn't protected him, but that didn't matter right now. Gaining a bit of altitude, he soared over the battlefield and flew to a position behind Godfather. There he launched into a dive. If he could only hit the villain from behind, he might have a chance of defeating him.

It seemed like Nigel's plan might work. Flying at a dizzying speed, he came closer and closer to reaching Godfather, and the man continued to face the other way. But it wasn't to be. A second before impact, Godfather whirled around and caught the fist that should have hit his head. Nigel tried to pull his hand back, but found that it was trapped in Godfather's grip. Leaping Lizzies the man was strong. It required both of Nigel's hands and every ounce of power in his body to pull himself free. Change of plans. He reached into his pocket and fished out a S.C.A.M.P.P. This seemed to frighten Godfather: he retreated in the direction of the catapult. Repeated blasts from the S.C.A.M.P.E.R. caused him to stumble, but didn't stop him. Without pause, he jumped into the catapult's bucket and telekinetically pushed forward a ramp. Right then, a boomerang smashed into his head, toppling him backwards. But the catapult's arm was already swinging forward, and enough of Godfather's inert body was still in the bucket. Thus he was propelled hundreds of feet into the air-right towards the waiting airborne dragon.

Nigel glanced at the Code Module. Godfather had left it behind, but it was now a heap of ashes and melted plastic. Only the stone slab remained. He thought of giving chase anyway-Godfather had clearly been knocked unconscious, and he might not have a pilot. But as he observed the white dragon hopefully, it roared to life. In the blink of an eye, it was already several miles away.

Forgetting the ship, he returned to what was happening on the beach. The other operatives and Rachel's family were making their way towards him. The group was forming a protective circle around Rachel, although the Supreme Leader's family was trying to push the other people away.

He ran forward and placed a hand on Rachel's shoulder. "Are you all right, Rachel?"

"I'm fine, Nigel." she said in a voice where relief and bitterness mingled. They treated me well, gave me almost everything I asked for. I'm just…I'm sorry about this. I, I wish I'd seen the attack coming yesterday morning."

"I don't think anyone could have foreseen Godfather's move. He used Battle Ready Armor. We've -

Rachel's father cut him off. "You can talk later to Rachel, Nigel." He said in a barely polite voice. "Right now, we'd like to go home."

Numbuh 36 raised his hand. "I'll take you back home. I need to get away from these losers anyway."

"See you later, everyone!" Rachel called out meekly as she was hustled away.

After Numbuh 36's ship had left, the remaining operatives sat down on the beach. They took in the chirps of the surrounding birds and crickets, and let the humid tropical air wash over them. Apart from the fauna, the only sound came from Numbuh 74.2, who was scribbling away on a clipboard covered in divisions, multiplications, and spider diagrams.

"Well, we did it." said Numbuh 3.2.1. eventually. "We saved the Supreme Leader."

"But we lost the Code Module." deplored Patton, getting up and rummaging through the ash pile. "What's gonna to happen to the KND?"

Numbuh 3.2.1. laughed sarcastically. "What going to happen? What do you think, Numbuh Five? In a couple of years, we'll extinct."

"Three years and nine months, according to my calculations." Said Numbuh 74.2. "Assuming we keep the retirement age at 13."

Monty stood up as well. He looked irritated. "Why makes you think we'll go extinct? We abolished decommissioning, remember?"

Numbuh 74.2 gave Monty a blank stare. It was evident he hadn't factored this development into his calculations.

"That's true, Numbuh Zero." Patton replied. "But it won't make much difference. Even without decommisioning, we can't expect our current operatives to stay on indefinitely. When they become teenagers, they'll have more and more outside responsibilities, like schoolwork and girlfriends and what not. Sooner or later, they'll have to step down. I do not know when exactly that will happen. It could be at age fourteen or age 18. But it will happen. As of this moment, our days are numbered."

"Point taken." said Monty curtly. "But even if the KND does go extinct, it doesn't mean that Evil Adults Industries will win. You can let the adult police handle things from now on. By my calculations-from what I've seen on TV-they've arrested more than half of your known criminals."

Monty's reasoning provoked a scoff from Patton. "You actually trust the adult news, Numbuh Zero? How can you be sure that they haven't been infiltrated?"

"Well for one thing, Numbuh 60, the crews of the news channels I watch haven't changed since the KND was exposed. And I doubt that Father or anyone would have infiltrated the channels before the KND's exposure."

"I hate to burst your bubble, Numbuh Zero, but our villains have been known to infiltrate the adult channels. Professor Triple Extra Large in particular has mastered the art." As Patton spoke, Nigel noticed that he sounded more subdued than usual. It was a welcome change from his brash, thick-headed, behavior.

Monty paused for thought, disconcerted. But he quickly collected himself. "I didn't know about this, Numbuh 60. But even if all the adult channels I watch have been infiltrated, I've seen a dozen villains get arrested with my own eyes by the police. And moreover, what's happening around the world confirms what the news channels are saying."

"He's right, Numbuh 60." chimed in Abby. "In case you haven't noticed, the number of attacks on kids has gone way down since Monday. If you don't believe me, check the Super Computermabob. »

Nigel decided to join in. "It's not that simple, Numbuh Five. Fifty percent of our enemies may be behind bars, but the rest are still at large. I suspect they won't risk any more open confrontations. Instead, they'll use normal jobs to achieve their goals, or take hostages, or threaten to blow stuff up."

He did not get a chance to say anything more on the subject, because his signal watch was beeping.

"Yes, mom?"

"Is everything all right? Did you get Numbuh 362 back?"

"Yeah, we got her back. Her family acted like she was the President of the United States, but you can't really blame them."

"Was she hurt?"

"No. Embarrassed, I think, but not hurt."

"Good, good. Anyway, I thought I should let you know, there's someone at home who'd like to talk to you. He seems very impatient, too."

"Who?"

"Someone from Evil Adults Industries. Numbuh 113."

"Numbuh 113? You're kidding."

"Who's he?"

"Oh, he's only the biggest traitor of the 7th Age of the Kids Next Door! He gave half of our missions and the Moonbase's access codes to Father. We almost lost the Moonbase because of him. Mom, whatever you do, do not give him anything to eat or drink. In fact, keep him out of the house, okay?"

"I can't send him outside. It's still pouring rain."

"Fine then. Just make him feel as unwelcome. We'll be back in Cleveland in twenty minutes."

Nigel was as good as his word. He and Monty made the return trip in eighteen minutes. No sooner had they landed in Cleveland that he jumped out of the SCAMPER. He slammed the front door shut and ran into the living room, where Mary walked past, carrying a portrait.

"He's in the kitchen." she said absent-mindedly.

"Thanks." Nigel replied.

Sure enough, in the kitchen, a chubby, puffy-cheeked adult was sipping on a mug of coffee. At Nigel's arrival, he smiled widely, got up, and offered his hand. "It's an honor to meet you, Numbuh One."

Nigel kept his hands to himself. "I heard you wanted to see me, Numbuh 113." he said stiffly. He looked over the ex-operative curiously, and noticed that his eyes seemed to be tightened in a permanent squint. He wore the standard uniform for high-ranking E.A.I. agents-a business suit that was black on the outside and red on the inside. All this did not inspire confidence.

"Please, call me Thomas." said the other boy, who seemed to be returning Nigel's curiosity. "I'm not an operative anymore, remember?"

"Thank you for reminding me." grunted Nigel sarcastically.

"You're something of a legend at Evil Adult Industries, you know?" Thomas went on. "We consider you one of our bravest and most persistent adversaries. You've been very lucky, too. But I think luck goes to those who deserve it."

"We've all been lucky." grunted Nigel. "Now what can I do for you?"

Thomas cleared his throat. "I'll get straight to the point. How would you like to erase the events of this week? How would you like to go back in time and prevent them from ever happening?"

Curiosity welled up in Nigel like a fireball in Godfather's hands. But though he took a seat, he made sure to remain impassive. "I'm listening."

"Well, our engineers at Evil Adults Industries built a time machine a couple of years after I joined them. We just lack a sufficient power source. And's that where you come in."

"What do you mean?"

"We know that you recently found the Book of the KND. And we think that this book could allow us to power the time machine."

Nigel threw Thomas an inquisitorial glance. "Hold on a second. How do you know about the Book of the KND?"

"Our spies told us."

"What spies? They must have been awfully good."

"They didn't have to be good. Frankly, Nigel, you weren't very careful about keeping the secret. You talked with your friends about the book in the middle of the school cafeteria."

"Fair enough. But it still doesn't make sense. When we talked about the book, I didn't see anyone hovering near our table. And the cafeteria tables are spread far apart, so I don't think someone at another table could have overheard us."

"You were definitely overheard." said Thomas smugly. "But I can't tell you how. It's classified information."

Nigel yawned and looked at his watch. "Have it your way. You know what, I should probably get going. I've got homework to do."

"No wait, don't go!" said Thomas, losing his composure.

Nigel pushed back his chair and stood up."Then who were the spies?"

Scott looked around him, as if worried that someone was listening in on them, and dropped his voice. "I'm really not supposed to be telling you this. They come outer space, and they wear business suits and glasses. They said they keep tabs on you."

"Where can I find them?"

"I don't know. They don't tell us."

"That's not good enough." He began to walk away.

"Wait." cried the former operative. "There is one way you might find them. We're supposed to meet on Wednesday at 8 AM, at the Black Factory."

"Where exactly?"

"The North Gate."

Still Nigel hesitated. A meeting at Evil Adults Industries? It sounded like a trap. Sensing this, Numbuh 113 made a further seduction effort. "Think about it, Numbuh One. If we had been the ones to discover that you had the book, we would have stolen it already."

"Are you saying that no one at Evil Adults Industries knows I have the book, besides you?"

"Yes." said Numbuh 113 beseechingly. "I'm the only one who spoke to these kids from outer space. At least for the moment."

Nigel scrutinized the former operative. He might still be lying. But it was impossible to verify that right now, and his statement made sense-it explained where the brain-tampering device in Monty's shoe had come from. He returned to his chair. "Okay, I believe you. _At least to a certain extent._ So you want me to use the Book to power your time machine?"

"Yes. If you do that, everything that happened to you this week will be erased. It'll be nothing more than a bad dream. Interested?"

"Very. But I have to check something first." Opening the Book of the KND, Nigel flipped open to the index. "Let's see…time travel…dangers of...page 1000." Tantalizing possibilities were taking shape in his mind. If he went back in time, he could save the lives of everyone on the Moonbase. Or he could go further still and reverse the outcome of the battle against the Delightful Children, thus preserving the Treehouse. The question was, was the plan feasible? On page 1000, he found a brief article on time travel. Sure enough, the answer to his question was there, but it wasn't encouraging.

While Nigel carefully moved through the text, Thomas peered over his shoulder. "So? What does it say?"

"It says here that time travel disrupts the fabric of space and time, and that the fabric will automatically try to eliminate the disruption."

"And how does it do that?"

"Well, uh, in 50 % of all known cases, by causing the time traveler to merge with his past self. And if that happens, the traveler loses all of his memories from the future."

"In other words..." realized Thomas, the confidence leaving his face.

"In other words, if I go back in time, I only have a 50 % chance of succeeding."

"What happens to the people who don't merge with their past selves?"

Nigel could see that Numbuh 113's hands were trembling with suppressed nervousness. Nonetheless, he slammed the book shut. "It doesn't matter. I'm not doing it. It's too dangerous."

"Then find someone who's willing to try. Or just let me try. I don't care if I fail."

"No. I'm sorry, Numbuh 113, but if you use the time machine, every villain on the planet will try to do the same."

"Try to understand. I need to go back in time. Deserting to the adults ruined my life. I lost all my friends, my parents split up...I can't take it anymore!" He slammed his hands on the table so hard that the coffee mug rattled.  
>Nigel moved his chair back a short distance. His confidence in Thomas sank even further. For a moment, he wanted to tell the ex-operative that he deserved his current troubles. But that would be cruel. And though Nigel might be selfish or insensitive at times, he wasn't cruel.<p>

"I'm sorry, but I can't give you that book. If you want to rebuild your life, try distancing yourself from Evil Adults Industries. You know, wipe the slate clean. Or…

"Or what?"

"I was going to say that you could help us capture Godfather. Give us Godfather, and you'll go down in KND history as a hero."

"Are you crazy?! Do you even know what he does to people who betray him?"

"Let me guess, he grinds them into coffee?"

"No!" retorted Scott. "It's much worse than that. He traps them in a virtual reality where they're constantly reliving their worst memory."

"That sounds horrible." Nigel admitted.

"It is. Do you see why I can't betray Godfather?"

"I do. But I can't give you the book. I'm sorry."

Wordlessly, Thomas shook his head. "Then I guess we have nothing more to say to each other." He began to walk away, halting at the kitchen's entrance. "I don't get you, Numbuh One. You don't even know if the information in that book is correct."

"Maybe, but I won't sacrifice someone to find out."

Scott had nothing more to say. But as he left, Nigel heard him utter some curse words that would have earned him an automatic detention at school.

Once he was sure that the former operative had left the building, Nigel went to the phone and called Rachel's home. He realized that it wasn't safe to keep the Book of the KND with him. Numbuh 113 might try to steal it, or encourage other KND traitors to do the same. The Book needed to be put in a safe place, either the Moonbase or the Arctic Base.

"Hello?" answered Rachel.

"Hi, Rachel. I just wanted to make sure: are you feeling all right?"

"I'm actually fine. Like I said on the island, Evil Adults Industries treated me well. They gave me plenty of food, a real bed, a bathroom, even books. They did force me to do house chores in the place where I was being kept, but it wasn't as bad as I expected."

"House chores? That must have been horrible."

"Actually, I thought it would be, but it wasn't. And I talked to Godfather. I think that from now on, I'm gonna do help out around my house more often."

Sector V's leader held his breath. "Are you serious?"

There was no uncertainty in her response. "Absolutely."

Nigel clenched the phone. He wished that Rachel was next to him, so that he check her eyes to see if they weren't completely blue." "Rachel, you haven't been brainwashed, have you?"

"No, I decided this on my own!" she said angrily. "Why can't you be more open-minded?!"

"I just had to make sure." snapped back Nigel. "Relax, okay?"

"Sorry." she said, and she did sound sincere.

He took a moment to cool himself. He was wrong to get angry. But still, their debate reminded Nigel of a problem that had been lurking at the back of his mind for nearly two days, and that absolutely needed to be resolved.

In his mind he wound the clock back to Friday evening, just before dinner.

_Nigel lay curled up on the main sofa of the living room, nose buried in the Book of KND. His mother walked by, a stack of plates in hand._

_"Hey, mom. Did you know that the Renaissance was actually a diversion created by adults while they tried to control what was taught in schools?"_

_"That's very nice. Could you help me set the table, please?"_

_Nigel raised his head from the book, vaguely amused. It wasn't often that he heard his mother make jokes. "Set the table? What am I, a slave?"_

_"Don't be ridiculous. Since when does setting the table qualify you as a slave?"_

_Frustrated, he shut the book with a snap. "Since the Kids Next Door constitution said that, of course."_

_"Look, I don't care what the rules say-"_

_"You don't care? But Dad says you helped write them."_

_Mary froze as she realized her mistake. "All right." She admitted, half-annoyed, half-amused. "So I did help. And there was no rule that prohibited helping out around the house ."_

_"Well that rule definitely exists today. The rules must have been changed after you made them."_

_"Fine then. If you don't believe me, we can ask Numbuh 362 right now."_

_Nigel almost took her up on the offer, but then decided against it. Why would his mother sound so confident if she was bluffing? More importantly, why would she lie to him?_

_"Fine, I'll help you." said Nigel ungraciously, getting to his feet. "But if you ask me, there's something fishy about this."_

"Rachel, if you don't mind, there's something I need to ask you. Do the organization's rules allow us to help perform house chores? My copy of the constitution says that we're not, but I don't know, maybe I have an outdated version."

"Uh, Nigel. I'm sorry, but I'm not finished talking with parents. I need to go."

"No wait! I need to know. Is it allowed?"

There was a pregnant pause. When Rachel answered, she sounded eerily like Numbuh 113. "Yeah it's allowed. I shouldn't be telling you this, but the rule was changed a couple years back, to make operatives more combative."

"Please tell me you're joking." snapped Nigel. Despite feeling sorry for Rachel, he was sorely tempted to lose his temper.

Rachel must have sensed it, because her retort was even more snappish. "Hey give me a break. I've only been Supreme Leader for a week. And in case you've noticed, I've had a lot on my plate lately. Like getting kidnapped."

"I'm sorry. I spoke too quickly."

"And there's something I wanted to tell you." she continued. "I don't want to be Supreme Leader anymore."

Nigel shook his head. This second revelation was even more confounding than the first one."Why not?"

"It's too much stress and responsibility. And my parents want me to leave the KND. My kidnapping scared the living daylights out of them. Can you blame them?"

Again, Nigel felt surprised, but to a much weaker extent. "No, I can't. But I thought being Supreme Leader was your dream!"

"It was. But it's way more time-consuming than I expected. And I won't be resigning. I just want a less important job."

"But who's supposed to take over your position? I'm not sure I trust Numbuh 60. He's as thick as they come."

"I have to go, Nigel. We can talk later."

"Okay, I'll see you later." said the younger operative.


End file.
